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[Arden Patricks]

"I... I don't know, maybe the fact I still have feelings for you and probably always will, so I can't help but be a bit jealous even though I know that it's stupid and I haven't any right?" I ask, sighing - for once just coming out with it all instead of beating around the bush. "... But I really do just want you to be happy, so whenever you find out... that's what you should do, and that's alll the advice I can really give."

[Riley Pearson]

I was surprised when I actually heard her give a real answer. I was expecting her to just shrug... or maybe roll her eyes at me like I was supposed to already know the answer. That was kind of relieving to know that's what she was actually thinking.
"Well, I still have feelings for you too.." I said after a few moments. I tried not to, but it was pretty inevitable and bound to happen. If I knew what was better for me though, I should probably just stay away from both of them romantically... but I didn't really care much. So that either makes me a masochist, or maybe just stupid. ".. And you're not stupid.. and of course you have the right.."
".. I don't know.. if I didn't.. go back to Riyann.. would you..?" I asked a moment later, not finishing my sentence, hoping she'd get that I meant for that to ask if she would want me, or something along those lines.
I don't know why but I got the impression somewhere along the line that she didn't have feelings for me anymore. Now that I know she did, I guess I had more to think about.

[Arden Patricks]

"I don't know," I say again, shaking my head. "I can't really think that far ahead right now." Not when I'm hurting so much over the last guy.
"But, if I did... it wouldn't be for a while," I add after a moment. "I don't want... to just jump into something immediately, you know? So you shouldn't... wait around for me or anything."

[Riley Pearson]

I nodded faintly at her answer. So I either waited for her.. to more than likely find that she won't want me anymore.. or I give Riyann another chance. When I said it like that and thought about it for a few moments, maybe it would be better... not only for me but for the girls... if I stuck with Riyann. I didn't really want to say that aloud though.
"Yeah, I understand.." I said quietly to her part about not wanting to jump into anything. It made sense... and was probably better that way.
But I didn't really reply verbally to the rest and just nodded faintly again.

[Arden Patricks]

I nod back, biting hard on my lip. What I really want to do is tell him never mind, there's really nothing wrong with jumping from one relationship to another. But I know that's ridiculous, and it'd serve me right to lose him. I had my chance and blew it.
Ansd so now I'm not sure what to say, if anything.

[Riley Pearson]

But at the same time, I couldn't help but get the sudden urge to kiss her. This was obviously going to be an issue between us, no matter what. Even though I know I told her never to kiss me again, I really wanted her to forget that promise and just do it.
And actually, if she hadn't just said she needed time, I probably would have kissed her right now. But I think that doing that would probably be at least slightly jerkish and I thought it maybe not the wisest thing to do.
It's been silent for a bit too long now and I bit my own lip for a short second as I stood there.
"... You should let me know when it's been long enough..." I said a moment later, looking up to her. ".. Just in case." Because I was fairly certain I would always love her... there wasn't much away around it.

[Arden Patricks]

"Sure." I smile faintly, hoping it doesn't look forced. "Unless you're with Riyann by then, and then I'll just tell you it was all a silly crush and I'm over you."
Dammit. I bite my lip again, wishing I could take back the words. Stupid thing to say.

[Riley Pearson]

I smiled and shook my head faintly, "You know I'll never believe that." I said with a small laugh, before moving some and leaning against the nearest wall.
".. But if Riyann and I are together.. and actually happy, then maybe it'd be best not to.." Interrupt? No, I don't think that's the best idea.. but maybe I can just leave it at that. ".. say anything.." I added a moment or two later, hoping that sounded okay.
In some ways, I think I would love to know, but in others I'm fairly certain it would end up just being a huge mess. Which I think I've had enough of.. as well as the kids.
A few moments passed and I looked back up to her again, ".. Are you sure you need a while?"

[Arden Patricks]

"No, I guess you wouldn't." I laugh faintly, somewhat sadly. "Even if it was true. You never could leave well enough alone."
I bite my lip then and nod, pause briefly, and then shake my head. "I wouldn't try to break you two up or anything. I... couldn't do that to you."
And yes, I think I do need a while... but I can't be really sure, and I don't want to think about because then I might decide that really I don't, and then... then what? Would it really be so awful?

[Riley Pearson]

I smiled, a touch sadly, with a small laugh, "Yeah, I guess I couldn't really.." I replied, thinking back for a short moment. "... Sorry about that, actually." I added, being pretty positive that I was quite annoying at times.
Nodding faintly after a moment, I said, "I didn't really think that you would.. I'm just worried what I might do if I found out, you know?" I'm sure I would make a mess of things. Somehow.
She didn't reply and I nodded again, "Right."

[Arden Patricks]

"It's all right." i shake my head, smiling fondly. "In hindsight it's kind of sweet, even if it was exasperating at the time." I shrug slightly, then bite my lip again and nod. "Yes... I guess we don't really need any more drama, either of us."

[Riley Pearson]

I smiled, "I knew it." I nodded with a slight laugh when she said that it was sweet. I still wasn't sure if I could picture that, but hey, I'd take it. ".. Still sorry about the exasperating part though.."
"Yeah.. probably not." I said with a small nod, looking over to her and biting my lip for a second after a few moments. "... You know, this was easier when I didn't want to kiss you."

[Arden Patricks]

I shrug off the first bit, shaking my head - and then get caught off guard by the next thing he says.
... Dammit. I knew this was never going to work.
I don't know how to reply to that for a moment. There is, of course, an urge to just shrug and ask 'why don't you then?' and kiss him back... but I don't think that's the best idea, really.
"... Maybe this wasn't my most brilliant idea," I say finally. "Maybe I shouldn't stay here right now."

[Riley Pearson]

I shook my head. "No." I said, looking back over to her. I think she needed to not be alone and to not stay there. It'd be fine, I'm sure. And if not, I doubt a kiss would do anything. "It's okay, just don't worry about it."

[Arden Patricks]

"Oh, know there's good advice," I mutter under my breath, then shake my head. "Riley, come on. We know how this is going to end up. One of us gives in and kisses the other, who is all too happy to just let it happen until one of us, could be either, finally decides to snap out of it, and then it's all very awkward and we go our separate ways to cry and beat ourselves up, and then it just starts over again a few days or weeks later."

God, do I want to kiss him. And that isn't right because I said goodbye to Logan just two days ago, and it still hurts badly enough that even just thinking about it now makes me want to curl up under the ground. So I shouldn't be wanting to kiss someone else, but I do, and I think what I meant when I said I needed time was that it really would be nice to think clearly for a while, instead of being muddled like this.

[Riley Pearson]

I sighed and shrugged faintly, "I know that's how it always goes, but even if it does happen, we can just get over it, right?" I asked a moment later. "I'd rather have you here than there... and actually, if you weren't going to be here I can pretty much garentee that I would be there every day."

I bit my lip again and sighed, "I'm sorry that I ever mentioned it." I said quietly.

[Arden Patricks]

I shake my head slightly but have nothing to actually say, not until I've laughed very slightly and bitterly, shaking my head some more. "And what if you don't know where 'there' is?" I ask. "Maybe it's time that we tried to be apart for a bit. Mybe this was stupid and I should've let you think that I died."

[Riley Pearson]

I was slightly confused now I think, but I'm sure it was bound to happen eventually. When I said there, I actually meant being at her house instead of mine.. by herself rather than with me.
I shook my head faintly again and frowned slightly at the last thing that she said. "Just don't worry about it, Arden." After that, I don't think I really had the urge to kiss her much at the moment. At least not enough to initiate it. "I don't want to be here all day worrying about you."

[Arden Patricks]

I frown very slightly in confusion, not really sure where that's come from, but then just shake my head. "You don't have to, I'm fine. But clearly this was not a good idea, that's all. I'm a mess and you shouldn't have to deal with that."

[Riley Pearson]

".. Being apart is ridiculous. It doesn't solve anything." I said belatedly and a bit quietly, still frowning slightly.
"You don't seem fine to me.. and I haven't kissed you, have I?" I asked looking over to her. "I know you don't want me to, so I'm not. And I want to deal with it, okay?" Because if something happens, it would be way more difficult to deal with knowing that I could have prevented it.

[Arden Patricks]

"Sure it does," I mutter, shrugging, though exactly what it does solve I can't say in so many words. But I really do believe it would be better if I'd not come over here. I should have stayed out of his life; I've done enough damage already.
Which is why I resist the urge to correct him when he says that I don't want him to kiss me. I don't want to dig any deeper hols than I already have.

[Riley Pearson]

"I can't think of when staying apart ever solved anything." I said, shaking my head faintly. "We've tried it a few times and I have to tell you that I don't remember anything much good come out of it."
"Please just stay here.." I said eventually, looking over to her. "If I kiss you, you can leave." Saying that was probably a mistake, but it was too late to take it back now.

[Arden Patricks]

"Maybe that's because it never lasted," I argue, then cut myself off and look up at him in surprise, forgetting to lie. "And what makes you think I would leave if you kissed me? If it were really that simple this wouldn't be a problem."

[Riley Pearson]

I sighed and just shook my head at what she said. I still didn't see how it worked. Staying away from eachother just avoided the issue and didn't really solve a thing. I doubted the amount of time it was done for made any difference.
"I don't see how that matters..."

I sighed again, feeling a bit more confused again. "Because you don't want to start anything.. and if I recall, you just seemed to get really worked up about me wanting to kiss you.. I don't know, Arden, this is confusing.."

[Arden Patricks]

I sigh slightly, taking a deep breath and trying to gather my thoughts.
"What I'm saying is, I think maybe you'd be better off... that maybe we'd both be better off... if we just have nothing to do with each other anymore. It's that or just keep getting hurt, because I think we both know that just because we promise not to mess with each other doesn't mean it's going to happen."

[Riley Pearson]

"Then tell me again, Arden, why you came here?" I asked a moment later, wondering how the subject switched like this. She was here for a reason, so I just wished she could ignore all of.. this.
"This is stupid that we're letting it get in a way."

[Arden Patricks]

"I don't know... for a reason that doesn't really matter anymore." I shrug slightly. "I asked if I could stay, but now on second thought that was a really bad idea."

[Riley Pearson]

"It sounded important." I insisted to her, with a small frown. "It's not a bad idea, Arden.. And if it helps your decision at all, you should know I haven't wanted to kiss you since we started arguing. I think you might be better off staying here."

[Arden Patricks]

I 'm not certain why, but something about that second-to-last sentence strikes me as so funny that I can't help but laugh. I put a hand over my mouth but that doesn't help either, and instead I wind up sitting on the edge of an armchair, arms crossed tightly as I chuckle and look at the floor.
Sometimes I really want a reset button, to take back what I say so that I don't have to get caught up in all these stupid arguments. But maybe this will be near as good.

[Riley Pearson]

I stared at her for a moment, watching her sit on an armchair, and raised my eyebrows faintly as she started to chuckle.
I think I was sort of at wits end right now... and looking back it seems like it was over pretty much nothing... but at the same time, I really didn't feel safe about her staying by herself. I was worried. And I thought that it would just be better if she stayed here.
".. Just, nevermind." I said quietly before turning, picking up my mug and starting to walk into the kitchen.