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Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 12, 2009 7:29:53 GMT
It's been a few days, four to be in fact since I last seen Logan at the Leaky Cauldron. First off I think he's a complete jerk and ass for making me understand what Shelby goes through whenever a guy breaks up with her or just down right rejects her. Two, the way he didn't even seem to care when I pretty much ripped my heart out and offered it to him, only to be shattered by his cold hands in a billion pieces and three I still love him, or at least have strong feelings for him.... this is why exactly he's an jerk and an ass.
So now I'm on some doorstep, that I presume is Arden's place or whatever only because Logan never had a place of his own and I figured he would be with her as he's on the run still from the ministry. I knock on the door and shift from my left foot to my right to keep me occupied until someone answers the door.
There had to be a reason why he stopped the kiss so abruptly. He doesn't have a conscious that I know of so that couldn't be it. Nor does he have any moral values as I know for certain due to our partnership in the war. I think however he thinks of me no more than just a fuck buddy. That's all I ever was to him in the past and now even if I thought of it as more sometimes... okay. Most of the time.
As I figured there's no answer at the door. He's probably checked the window discreetly and seen it was me so now he's pretending that I'm not here or same for Arden which would be less understandable about why she would be avoiding me, unless he told her what happened at the Leaky Cauldron which I doubt because again he has no morals to speak of.
Either way, I turn the knob on the door and find that it's open. That's safe... I guess times have changed post-war. I remember a time where one of my most common spells in my arsenal was Alohomora.
I walk inside and notice that just like Arden, it's very plain and bare with nothing special or anything out of the ordinary that would stand out to catch someone's eye if they were to come and visit her. There's no sign of life either which is odd seeing as the door was completely unlocked. She must really be that stupid for leaving it like that unless she left the room for a second, but I think I'll stick with my first assumption.
I hear some shuffling of items or perhaps cupboards in the kitchen so I decide to go see for myself if it's Arden or Logan who's home. I don't care if it's Arden. That way I can just leave or maybe torture her just for some fun. Logan on the other hand I have some talking to do with him still whether he wants to or not.
I smirk instantly when I notice indeed it was Logan moving things around in the kitchen afterall. It seems to be apparent that he was making early lunch or late breakfast. I sigh lightly to myself as my arms find themselves on my hips and my feet move on their own to where was standing. He hasn't seen me yet as I'm staring at his back and I haven't really made any noise.
Once I'm about six to ten inches away from him I reach up and tap his shoulder and wait for him to turn around. Today I decided to be a little more well... conservative about my clothing choice; A green dress that sits on my knees with a black sweater as my curls stay intact. Actually today, I decided to be conservative and myself when I came. He at least deserves that even if he's a jerk. If was Arden here instead that would be hard to explain why I looked like I usually do in a very short black dress unless he told her what happened which I doubt again that he did.
"Hello. Miss me any since I've been gone?" I ask with a faint tone of cherriness which I have no idea where that came from but I shake my head and wait for his reaction of me standing in his girlfriend's kitchen with him completely unannounced. So much for trying to be conservative I guess.
[[gah... 3:30 in the morning = rambly. Matty go to the ooc thread and read up on what Jennie and I discussed.]]
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Post by Logan Andrews on Mar 12, 2009 10:17:52 GMT
I have a plan.
Plans are good...not exactly preferable, because I don't think I do very well with thinking five minutes into the future, but today I want to do what I'm doing.
First, coffee. Second, out...but as far away from the Leaky Cauldron as possible, and probably just sticking to a few streets radius from here because that's usually fairly safe and I don't run into anyone that I know.
So...that's it, I suppose. Not much of a plan, but it's something and I'm planning to adhere to it.
Or at least I'm planning to adhere to it, up until I feel a tap on my shoulder and half-assuming that it's Arden for some reason even though I don't even think she's here right now, I turn around.
And then take a hasty step back and away from her, because I'm clearly going slightly crazy again which is a shame because I thought I was getting better at being sane. Maybe it's this newfound conscience, the one I only realised that I had when I knew that kissing Ruby was wrong, and it's trying to make me confess all over again by manifesting itself with weird hallucinations.
But just in case that's not what's going on at all, I decide I might as well humour her until I work out what is going on and why she'd even be here.
"You're a stalker now, are you?"
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 12, 2009 16:10:55 GMT
"Yeah sure let's go with that. No, I haven't seen you for a few days. Maybe I was worried." I say crossing my arms in front of my chest lightly before giving him a shrug. I look at him for a second before hearing a couple of thoughts but the only thing I can even see right now is that he feels as if he's developing a conscious after kissing me... now that's interesting.
"So did you ever confess to her yet about what happened? You know kissing me seeing as you know you enjoyed it but you won't admit it even to me or yourself?" I ask simply with a smile. "Oh and may I have a cup of coffee with you?" I add overhearing his plan that he had for the day. "Sorry."
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Post by Logan Andrews on Mar 12, 2009 20:07:14 GMT
"You know, technically this is trespassing," I shrug as if I haven't heard anything she's said, mostly because I don't want to reply to any of it...because she has a very eerie knack of being right and then saying it out loud like that, because I haven't told Arden even though I half-tried to and I did enjoy it but I will not admit it and no, she can't stay because she can't just walk in here because I've been avoiding her for four days and it's gone very well and she's ruined it.
"What do you want?"
And I think she already answered that, but not with an answer I liked, about maybe being worried and I have a sudden urge to snap at her that she doesn't say things like that and she should stop acting crazy already because I'm getting sick of it.
And also it's one thing to be crazy in public, but this is a private residence and that's sort of overstepping the line. Apparently, she's never heard of boundaries.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 12, 2009 20:27:02 GMT
"Technically it's not if you leave a door unlocked." I say with a shrug before tilting my head slightly at him. I sort through his thoughts and smile lightly, but I don't say what he's thinking or answer any possible questions that I could because I know it has to be irritating and my reason for being here right now isn't to upset him just want him to admit what he really feels verbally.
"I thought I said already. I just want to spend some time with you is all. I promise not to be as crazy around you." I say with a nod before looking around the small kitchen. "Where's the coffee mugs at love?"
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Post by Logan Andrews on Mar 12, 2009 20:36:58 GMT
I try to look as exasperated as possible, not particularly hard considering just how exasperated I am right now.
"Spend some time-...?" I repeat after a moment, then shake my head once briefly, "You can't be here. Go away."
In case it's slipped her notice, which I'm sure it hasn't, this is Arden's house and I'm not quite sure how easily it'd be explained away if Arden happened to walk in right now...
It's not even as if I don't want to see Ruby, because I sort of do, I just really don't like being confused or uneasy and she has a very disconcerting habit of making me feel that way. Right now, however, she should just leave.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 12, 2009 20:46:00 GMT
"What's wrong love? Can't two friends just have a nice cup of coffee together? It's not like we're going to go into her bedroom have sex unless you want to Logan." I say with a wink before looking around still. "You didn't say where the coffee mugs were love." I repeat again this time turning around and putting a hand through my tangled curls. "What's wrong? You don't want me to spend time with you?''
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Post by Logan Andrews on Mar 12, 2009 20:51:01 GMT
I don't respond to any of that on the grounds that I really don't want to, and I'm not going to tell her to leave again because she hasn't listened so far and probably won't even if I say it again.
So I just lean back against the counter and remain silent.
I know we can start off on bad terms with me being as hostile as I want to, but usually that changes at some point and then I end up cheating. That's what happened the past couple of times anyway and I don't want it to happen again and that is why she should leave. Very soon.
I don't suppose I actually needed to say any of that either. She probably found it herself, bloody mind readers.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 12, 2009 21:11:08 GMT
"Someone's quiet." I say softly as I walk to where he was leaning on the counter. "I'm not going to read your mind today. So I will have no advantage as it's not fair." I say to him with a nod. "So tell me, why won't you admit to any of your thoughts?" I ask before I lean on the counter next to him.
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Post by Logan Andrews on Mar 12, 2009 21:14:31 GMT
"Good," I mutter, then shrug, "Because I don't want to."
Good enough answer, I suppose...honest at least in that I really don't want to admit anything to her and therefore most likely won't.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 12, 2009 21:33:05 GMT
"And why not?" I ask him as I move his one arm so it was around me now. "Arden isn't here and she won't have to know as you haven't told her yet. I think you'll feel better if you just tell me."
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Post by Logan Andrews on Mar 12, 2009 21:36:11 GMT
I sigh briefly to let her know I'm not entirely content with the contact, but don't remove my arm because I don't care enough to.
"I don't even know what you're trying to make me tell you," I shrug.
I have a vague idea, of course, so maybe I'm just deliberately blocking it out, but I'm getting to the level of unease where I'll pretty much say anything as long as it'll get her out of here faster.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 12, 2009 21:38:19 GMT
"What you feel about me. Come on love, you have to have some feelings after you broke that kiss. Even when we were partners. Afterall, I know you had or have some photos of me... well. You know." I say with a faint laugh before leaning onto his chest with a sigh. "I just don't get you is all."
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Post by Logan Andrews on Mar 12, 2009 21:43:24 GMT
Progressing from unease to severe discomfort. Not only is she here when she shouldn't be but she's also far too close and being far too invasive of my personal space, but by now I've already decided to just be complacent with her and then she'll leave.
I don't think she wants to know what I feel about her right now, because it's not exactly pleasant, but I suppose that's out of the ordinary as I usually hold her in fairly high regard.
"There's something," I admit reluctantly after a moment, "But it's not enough."
That's as good a way of describing it as any. Acknowledging that I do like her a bit, but I love Arden, and there's a difference.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 12, 2009 21:46:40 GMT
"Not enough... huh. I don't believe you. I think you should prove it somehow. Any ideas?" I ask him as I move so now I'm standing in front of him with my arms wrapped around him. "Maybe show me in a kiss. I heard normal people determine whether they like someone a little or a lot with a kiss."
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Post by Logan Andrews on Mar 12, 2009 21:49:52 GMT
"Well, we've already tried that and it didn't make anything very much clearer, so..." I shrug, glancing deliberately at the wall over her head rather than at her because I'm a little concerned about how my will power is holding up and it really shouldn't be this easy to shift from irritation to temptation.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 12, 2009 21:51:26 GMT
"I think you're lying. I think it made you realize the truth that you actually have feelings for me whether you like it or not." I say softly before pulling his chin down to face me. "Please? Tell me."
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Post by Logan Andrews on Mar 12, 2009 21:56:46 GMT
Don't make me do this...don't make me do this...
Although it's not actually her that does make me do this, more like poor impulse control deciding that I'm passing up an opportunity to make her stop talking and to kiss her, which I sort of want to do anyway because I, apparently, find it very hard to resist when she's right there, trying to make me...
So I kiss her and hope that suffices as an answer.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 12, 2009 23:30:46 GMT
I keep my eyes open for a moment before closing them. I honestly can't believe that worked, me just pulling his chin slightly to look at me and he kisses me. I should have just done that when I came in here. Now that I'm done thinking for the time being, I lean fully against him now so his arms were supporting me instead as my own arms found their way around his back. Standing on my tiptoes slightly, I make the kiss deeper after a couple seconds.
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Post by Logan Andrews on Mar 13, 2009 9:07:25 GMT
I wrap my arms loosely round her waist, kissing her deeply back.
I wonder when it's going to sink in just how stupid this is.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Mar 13, 2009 14:41:10 GMT
I don't think anything of it that the door is still unlocked like I probably left, like I always used to. This is a very safe neighborhood, other than the very rare murder. And somehow it would just feel too much like shutting up a pet so it can't run away if I locked up behind me while Logan's still there. That's how I've always thought it should be - you only lock the house at night or when nobody's home. Locking would also possibly discourage unwanted visitors, but I'm still not quite caught up enough to the idea of visitors in general to start thinking that way.
And even when I see what's going on in my kitchen, it isn't exactly the first thing to spring to mind. For all that I'm aware he invited her here, as an elaborate slap in the face. I'm not even sure at first who the hell she is, except that she's someone he's holding and someone he's kissing, and I feel like I just got kicked in the chest.
At least you never had to see it. At least I didn't rub it in your face like this and it was just a damn accident. How the fuck this is an accident, I'd really like to know.
But even though I'm thinking of shouting those things, I don't say a word. Just turn straight around and sit down on the couch, legs pulled up to my chest and forehead resting on my knees.
If you didn't want to be with me, why did you come back?
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Post by Logan Andrews on Mar 13, 2009 16:34:23 GMT
Ah...right about now, is when it sinks in just how incredibly stupid this is...was.
Definitely 'was' rather than 'is', because I certainly push Ruby away fairly quickly when I see Arden, slipping past her so I can head toward the couch because that seems like the logical thing to do...even though I have nothing to say.
'This is really not as a bad as it looks,' is an option, but I think maybe it's sort of worse than it looks...so that probably wouldn't be a good thing to say.
Someone should certainly say something at least, but I don't know what or who, and I've already followed the only clear path of action...which was 'get away from Ruby'.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Mar 13, 2009 16:44:05 GMT
"If that's who I think it is... or really if it's either of you... go the fuck away because funnily enough I don't really want you here," I say a bit more snappishly than I'm really feeling, voice a little muffled because I don't look up but I can tell there's someone there. I feel like a child, hiding my face and curled up like this, but at the same time I really don't care. I didn't think they saw me, and I thought I could sit here and get composed while they did whatever they felt like and then it'd be a while before I had to deal with this.
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Post by Logan Andrews on Mar 13, 2009 17:01:56 GMT
"Arden...ah..."
Now what the fuck am I supposed to say?
'Sorry I was stupid enough to cheat on you in your own house' somehow doesn't really seem quite right.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Mar 13, 2009 17:26:13 GMT
I look up at him then, shaking my head and not really listening to whatever he's just tried to say.
"What the hell is wrong with me?"
It's only just sinking in slowly that I recognize the woman he was with, and I really am an idiot because he probably was hinting at this the other day when he mentioned running into her, but I just brushed it off. I wonder when she's going to come in here, or if she'll just try to avoid it like... well, like I did when Riyann caught me and Riley together. I wince internally like that, remembering exactly why I believe in karma.
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Post by Logan Andrews on Mar 13, 2009 17:28:41 GMT
"What?" I ask, "What do you mean? There's nothing wrong with you."
Thank God I actually have something to say this time round though.
And I'm sort of hoping that maybe Ruby will just leave without butting in, because she'll probably just make it worse...if that's even possible.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Mar 13, 2009 17:32:48 GMT
I half-laugh at that, shaking my head. "Then why in the hell were you in there with her? Must be something."
Because that's why I cheated on him, because there was something wrong, something lacking, and that's no excuse but at least it's a reason. Last time his reason was spite, revenge, and I deserved it so tat was okay. I just want to know if I deserve this as well.
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Post by Logan Andrews on Mar 13, 2009 17:38:35 GMT
I shrug and mutter, "I don't know."
It isn't strictly a lie, because I don't entirely know because it was clearly a very stupid move. I also don't want to mention that I possibly have feelings for her, because that certainly stung when she said the same thing about Riley after she kissed him.
And this all feels very strange, having what should be a private conversation, when I know she's in the other room.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Mar 14, 2009 0:43:10 GMT
I half-laugh again. "I guess it's just karma, really. I've done this to you, I've done this to Riyann. Only a matter of time before it happened to me, right?"
But I'd still like to know why. And I'd also like to know if Shelby is ever going to come out of the kitchen.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 14, 2009 1:09:44 GMT
By the time I realize what's actually going on and why he pushed me away I walk out of the kitchen but stay a fair distance between both of them. I was listening the whole time and it for some reason I sort of feel bad... but not quite. I still have feelings for him and I still would kiss him after this if he even wants to after this. "Could be that, but I have a hunch Arden that Logan and I have mutual feelings for each other. He just told me before he kissed me in your kitchen." I say with a shrug before glancing at Logan now. "Come on love, you just have just told her and then this wouldn't have been such a surprise. Did you tell her about the Leaky Cauldron yet?"
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