avoidance

[Arden Patricks]

"I think it might apply a little too often," I shrug, really quite liking the tingly feeling when he tucks my hair back like that - enough so that I lean up to kiss him again and decide to think more later.
There really is something off-putting about being told to kiss someone though.

[Riley Pearson]

Now that I think about it, I probably should have more of asked her if I could kiss her again rather than sort of tell her, but I guess it was too late to re-word that. I shrugged faintly at what she said and next thing I knew I was kissing her again, letting the hand that pushed the hair behind her ear move back to where it was before slide it a little to the side of her neck again. I really couldn't help but think about how selfish I felt like I was being now, but once I thought it, I pushed it away and just continued to kiss her softly back.

[Arden Patricks]

The voice in my head has disappeared now... kind of like a parent who gives up and just decides to let the kid learn a lesson on her own, through experience, rather than continue to just try and stop her. It's only when you actually do fall down that you understand why you shouldn't have been climbing.
I break the kiss briefly to brush my lips lightly down his neck, then kiss him again. The voice is definitely gone now.

[Riley Pearson]

I let her break the kiss shortly and keep my eyes closed lightly as she brushed her lips lightly down my neck before kissing me again. It didn't seem like she was listening to whatever she was a few moments ago and really neither was I.
When she kissed me again, I did kiss her slightly deeper than I had before moving my fingers lightly over her skin on her neck.

[Riyann Servansikk]

Work at Hogwarts was work, and plenty hard enough when Ariella's gone. Actually I had gone and talked to Jack today, in the process of getting a quil since I'd already broken all of mine in the attempt at writing a letter, which I happened to fail miserably at. And really, talking to him did seem to help and he managed to convince me that she was fine, nothing happened to her, she was somewhere nearby. We talked about the house, and somehow Arden had been talked about, though I never said her name, he just told me I had to end up getting along with her, for Riley's sake.
And of course, because it's hard to say no or not believe Jack, I agreed with him on the Arden thing. It was only a one time thing, they kissed, Riley regrets it. It's good, fine, done with.

Talking with Jack was good, I got to talk to somebody about problems that really were sick of being talked out with the same people, but I did have to go, finish up a few things in the classroom and then come home, or to Riley's parent's house.

At the house I started walking towards the kitchen, wrapped up in my thoughts and what Jack and I had been talking about. "Hey Ri," I started as I stepped through the doorway and looked at him, not being able to finish my sentence at what I saw. "R-right." I mumbled, feeling my heart fall farther than I thought it could have and turned out of the kitchen, going towards the front door, it being clearly obvious he wasn't going to care, hopefully. A few tears slipped down my face, and I'm not entirely sure why I had let them when at the moment I really just hated him. Because everything good has to end. I thought, reaching for the doorknob and opening the door and slamming it behind me, not entirely sure where I could go.

[[Dum de dum, it sucks.. haha]]

[Riley Pearson]

I didn't hear a crack, or a door, or even footsteps for that matter. I had shut off my mind and apparently my ears as well, becuase if I had heard any of those noises, I would've came to my senses and pulled away. But that wasn't the case and I was still kissing Arden when I heard Riyann call from the opening of the kitchen door.
I pulled away quickly, stepping back from her abruptly. This wasn't happening. Or more of this was happening and I wish that it wasn't. What was wrong with me? Why in the world was I kissing her? All it was doing was ruining Riyann and my's relationship and leading Arden on. Neither of which I wanted to do.
I gave Arden one last look to Arden. I'd say it was something between a sympathetic and worried look, the worryment on my behalf, before running after Riyann quickly, hearing and seeing when she slammed the door shut. I opened it again and ran after her, grabbing onto her hand, "Riyann stop." I said shaking my head a little bit, wondering just how much I just messed up our marriage. I wanted her to yell at me, or something, hit me even.. I didn't care really care which at the moment.

[Riyann Servansikk]

I heard the door open after I slammed it and tried to ignore the fact that it was more than likely Riley running after me, but I didn't care this time. Feeling him grab my hand before telling me to stop and I did. I stopped, turned towards him as I tore my hand from his grip, several tears still falling down my cheeks as I did, willing to keep the rest from falling. It's different when you witness it first hand, then you can't lie to yourself and say it wasn't true, that the fact that the person cheated on you was a lie. When you see it there is no denying the fact that the person you loved most was cheating on you.
And it hurts.
"Give me one good reason why I should." I said, glaring at him as I did, almost tempted to add in that he should probably go in and see Arden before he loses her too, but no, I don't think I'm feeling that sympathetic, after all our daughter was missing and he does that where anyone could find that happening, instead of looking for her. Glad to know Arden can replace all of us.

[Riley Pearson]

Right, give her a reason. I paused for a moment, wanting nothing more than to come up with one and give her a reason. I knew I loved Riyann and yet I still did this to her. I was horrible. I shouldn't be given a chance, Probably not a good one at that. I wasn't thinking, I didn't know what I was doing.. I'm sure there were more, getting more and more ridiculous every time one was mentioned.
I watched her as she glared at me and shook my head a little, "I wasn't thinking." I said quietly, diverting my eyes away from hers, wondering why I said that. I don't deserve you.. Even though I technically wasn't thinking very much at the time. I didn't know what else to say. My mind was blank for a moment and I knew that wasn't a very good thing. Hopefully something would come to me. But I wasn't going to lie to her and I was going to tell her the truth. If she wanted to leave me, then I guess I couldn't very well stop her.

[Riyann Servansikk]

I somehow couldn't bring myself to believe him. He had said that the first time, that and it hadn't meant much. But for it to happen a second time it, I wasn't going to believe that. I wanted to say some remark that would hurt him, show him that I really did hate him right now, but I didn't, I just looked off to the side after he'd moved his eyes away from mine. "Where's my," daughter, not daughters, "daughter?" I asked, looking back at him. If he so much as says she's in the house then I really, I dunno what I'd do, just the fact that he could kiss Arden where I could come at any given time was enough to make me pissed with him, but if our daughter could walk in on them, then I think I'd hit him. I should still hit him. I don't think I was leaving, dunno if I'd so much as pay him any attention if I stay either.

[Riley Pearson]

I frowned a little more, if it was possible at what she said and kept my eyes to the ground, not being to able to look into hers. Not wanting to see the tears on her face or the glare that she kept in her eyes when she looked at me.
"I went to the house earlier..." I told her very quietly, "I dropped her off at Hannah's since she didn't want to come." I finished, feeling a tear or two fall down my face. I felt like I just lost her and it was all my fault. My fucking fault and I couldn't do anything about it now.

[Riyann Servansikk]

I watched as he frowned a little towards the ground, though I didn't let up on the glare that I held on him, I didn't look away or suddenly become sympathetic. Instead I waited for him to answer, and then nodded, ignoring the tear I saw fall down his face, ignored how quiet his voice was, though part of that might have been my fault for say my daughter, not our.
At the moment I didn't want to go pick Charlotte up, but I didn't want to go back into the house, not if Arden could be in there too, though I'm not sure if I'm entirely mad at her, more that Riley.
You've done worse.
And he let me walk in on him kissing her.
Over-reacting.

[Riley Pearson]

I was quiet for a while longer and I shook my head a little bit, looking down at the ground. The whole situation just starting to hit me. That this was all real, that it was all really happening.
"Yell at me." I said looking up to her finally, "Please, just do something. Yell at me, hit me.." I said feeling a few more tears fall from my eyes. "Tell me you hate me." I added a little quieter. "I'm confused.. and I don't know what the hell's wrong with me for messing us up." I said, not being able to take the silence anymore.

[Riyann Servansikk]

I kept my eyes on him, seeing him shake his head at the ground and raised an eyebrow before simply glaring at him again.
He looked up and I looked him in the eyes when he started speaking, wondering why I had stopped when I told him to give me a good reason when I hadn't even thought it was a reason in the least. You can still leave, run away from this too, mess it up more that way. The things he was saying though, they tore at me even more, making my heart fall slightly more, I knew he was sorry, I knew he was, but I couldn't forgive him again, I wasn't him, I couldn't deal with all of this. "I shouldn't ever have come back." I said in a whisper, not doing anything what he was begging me to do, not saying anything to what he said, referring to when I was dead. I shouldn't have come back then, I should've stayed dead like a good little ghost and let him be with Arden.

[Arden Patricks]

I think all the blood drained out of my face when I saw Riyann, and it still has not come back though it’s been a few minutes now. I didn’t even notice when either of them left the room, too wrapped up in asking myself what the hell is wrong with me.
This is all my fault… you should have stayed away.
At some point I must have sat down, because suddenly I notice that I’m sitting on a chair with my face in my hands, as if maybe I can hide from what just happened.
I think I’m officially a homewrecker… congratulations, Arden. What a wonderful achievement.
I knew I should have stayed a bloody hermit.

[Riley Pearson]

"Don't say that." I said shaking my head a little more this time. I couldn't believe that. I could believe that she herself had said it, but I couldn't believe that she shouldn't've. This was my fault, I messed things up, but that didn't mean she shouldn't be alive.

[[[lol, i just noticed you posted jennie... xD ]]]

[Riyann Servansikk]

I heard him tell me not to say that, and if I wanted I could yell at him for telling me what to do, but I wasn't going to do that, it would be incredibly stupid. "I shouldn't have. You'd be better off and everything." I said, shaking my head, a few more tears fall down my face, I hated that I couldn't hate him, I hated that I just said I should be dead, and I believed it more than anything. "This wouldn't have happened." I'd only be a dead girl crying to herself because you would have forgotten me and moved on to someone else who was alive.

[]

[Riley Pearson]

"Yeah, it wouldn't've happend." I said shaking my head a little bit. "But there's also a lot of other things that wouldn't've happend." I said staring at her now. "Please don't tell me that you really believe it would've been better." I wouldn't've forgotten her and I hoped she knew that.

[Riyann Servansikk]

The only thing I can think is, Fine, I won't tell you, and I wasn't planning on it, I was sure he could already guess that I had meant it, that I really believed it. At the moment I wanted to tell him that I really did hate him, but not having anything to say I brushed past him and headed for the house, really doubting Arden was going to be in there as it was, and if she was then I suppose she and Riley could pick up where they left off and I could just go upstairs and hide in a closet or something, pretend it hadn't happened, that I hadn't witnessed that, that I was still the ghost and I was only seventeen and watching this happen, only it wasn't a bad thing happening.

[Arden Patricks]

There’s a serious debate going on in my head now, between apparating out like a coward so I don’t have to face anyone – especially Riyann – and sucking up the courage to walk out there like a normal person… who just kissed a married man for the second time.
But I’m not that much a coward, or that bold. So I think I’ll stay here for all eternity, or until a better solution presents itself… or until Riyann walks back into the house instead.

((Oh! Right... hello right back at you. ;D ))

[Riley Pearson]

She brushed past me and I didn't know what to say. I was pretty sure that I knew that she meant what she said and I was also sure that she hated me. At least right now. And I was starting to wonder if Arden was still inside. I waited for a moment before hesitately following her back, but keeping my distance.

[Riyann Servansikk]

Hate you. I couldn't help but think that as I made my way to the door, though I didn't hate him, I don't think it was possible in anyway. And I hate it. Opening the door I stepped into the house and then swung it shut slightly hard that it could've been considered that I had slammed it, though I was more than sure it wasn't.
"Why'd this have to happen while I'm still pregnant?" I asked under my breath, really hating that fact as well. If I didn't know Riley I might just say he was doing this to just laugh in my face because I had to deal with this without the firewhiskey or picking up the habit of smoking or going back to drugs.
Walking into the kitchen I was both somewhat surprised to see Arden, but then again I just ignored her as I grabbed a bottle of water and moved so that I was sitting on the counter, taking a quick drink, wondering if this was going to annoy her or not.

[[How's you Jennie?]]

[Arden Patricks]

I watch her a little bit warily, straightening up and then standing as quietly as I can so as not to draw attention to myself. I'm a little surprised when she ignores me though it makes a certain sense that she'd want to. It's a little too perfect for me, though, because now I can just slink out the door like a coward... like a kid who's just escaped punishment because her parents started fighting with each other instead.

I pause in the doorway, thinking that, and decide that I just can't. I have to be an adult and not a coward about this, even if I'd rather not. I at least have to try and apologize... do what I can to make things right.
"Riyann?" I ask, getting the word out along with a deep breath.

((And I am quite well, thank you. How about yourself?))

[Riley Pearson]

She slammed the door basically in my face and I stopped in front of it, hitting my head against it a little harder than I wanted. I wasn't sure if I even wanted inside. Especially since I didn't know if Arden was still in there or not. After a few moments, I opened the door, stepping inside quietly, but staying infront of the door instead of finding where either or them or just Riyann was.
I heard Arden speak and stayed where I was deciding to just listen and not go into the kitchen where they both were.

[Riyann Servansikk]

Riley hadn't come back in, not that I knew of at least, and I sat there, looking towards Arden as she spoke, not surprised to see her in the doorway, thought the fact that she had stopped and said my name was surprising, I didn't let it show, instead I kept my face empty of the emotions I was feeling. Hurt, anger, more than that, just all hidden, and I'm slightly tempted to go hide in 'our' room and cry my eyes out like I really want to, but I don't, I stay where I am and raised a small eyebrow towards her, not saying anything, afraid my voice might betray me just like the reason I was keeping my face empty, incase my emotions betray me.

[[that's good ^.^ Is good...]]

[Arden Patricks]

I falter slightly, not sure I can actually say it, but close my eyes and force myself.
"I'm sorry. I really am. I'm sorry I've done this again, and I won't...." Won't what? I falter again, not sure what I was planning to say there.


(( ))

[Riyann Servansikk]

I listened to her, the surprise that she hadn't simply left without saying anything slowly disappearing, and I actually feel guilty from how I've been treating her, though I'd be much better about it had I not just witnessed this, like Jack said, 'For Riley's sake'. After she's finished, or rather cut herself off I'm tempted to ask her what she won't do, or rather snap at her because I'm nowhere near a good mood right now. Doesn't anyone know you're not supposed to piss a pregnant lady off? "Doesn't matter." I said simply and taking another drink of my water. I hadn't been saying it like I didn't accept her appology, rather saying it like it doesn't matter that she's gone and kissed him again. It didn't, though it was a lie, I could at least pretend.

[Riley Pearson]

I stood my the door listening to the two of them talk, biting my lip slightly when I heard Arden apologise. I waited and listened for Riyann's reply, and when I heard it just looked to the floor, unsure of what to think about it for the moment.
I was thinking of going in there, but I knew I shouldn't... or at least, I knew I didn't want to. Not yet.

[Arden Patricks]

I very nearly protest when she says it doesn't matter, but then just close my mouth again, shaking my head. I won't bother you again. I think that's what I was planning to say, or something like it. So I really shouldn't keep inflicting my presence on her now.
"I'm still very sorry," I say quietly anyway, turning to leave again. I never should have come here today.

[Riyann Servansikk]

I almost feel bad when she's gone and appologized again, it wasn't her bloody fault, more like it was Riley's because he was the one that was married. Not like Arden was going to pick any person off at random and kiss them, so long as they were married. "Arden." I called softly, biting my lip a little. "Sorry too." I whispered, smiling weakly towards her as I did, though the smile held no real meaning behind it.

[Arden Patricks]

I look back, a little startled when she calls my name, and am stunned into silence by what she says.
"You have nothing to apologize for," I say finally. Or, actually maybe you do for sort of being a whore in the first place... so then that makes four of us, really, who ought to take the blame for this whole mess. It's no one person's fault.

((Going to go now, by the way. See you elsetimes.))