|
|
Post by Riley Pearson on Mar 7, 2009 23:15:59 GMT
We'd recently packed up all of our belongings and moved back into our house. I had done an alright job cleaning it up and I figured that it had been long enough that it was okay to move back into.
Maybe that's what did it. Maybe that's the reason I woke up this morning feeling depressed.. and lonely. I felt perfectly fine the night before... almost okay actually... at least as long as I didn't think about the fact that it seemed like no one wanted me. I knew that Arden definitely didn't... and Charlotte really didn't. Even if Charlotte did though, I don't know if I would take her back at this point. And then there was Riyann, who after visiting that one time, seemed to have disapeared off the face of the earth again...
At least I had my kids though... that was something. They still loved me... I think at least.
And now that I was thinking about it, I really had no idea what I was going to do when the girls both went off to Hogwarts. It'd just be me and Justin.. That wouldn't be too bad, I guessed.
After trying to convince the girls to hang out with me, they decided they would rather go to a friend's house.. and feeling the way I was right now, decided to just let them. I took them there and then just so I could be a bit more free, dropped Justin off at our babysitters.
Now I was just walking around Diagon Alley... It was pretty empty, surprisingly, for the time of the day, but I can't say that I really minded. I sighed a bit and just sat down on a bench by a few bare trees. It was pretty chilly out, but I didn't really mind. Yeah, I was still a bit depressed, but it wasn't too bad and things would get better... at some point. |
|
|
|
Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 8, 2009 10:50:54 GMT
Funny how the people you least expect to run into are in the same place you are. Just funny. I lean against an alleyway opening watching my favorite cousing walk about and sitting down on a bench. He seemed to be alone for some reason. No girlfriend or kids in tow I guess today. Perfect for me to bother him like I usually do when I see him. I guess it's just an old habit that you can't seem to quit.
Walking over, I put on my best smile but fail miserably as I sit down next to him, crossing my left leg over the other. "Hello hun. Is your life really that pathetic that you have to sit in Diagon Alley all by your lonesome? No one to talk to either? I can if you'd like." I laugh faintly, as the chilly wind tosses my hair over my shoulders and plays with my long pearl and silver chain earrings. |
|
|
|
Post by Riley Pearson on Mar 8, 2009 18:15:40 GMT
I glanced over hearing a voice and frowned slightly when i saw who it was. I didn't feel like being bothered today, and it was pretty obvious that it was Rubalyn and not Shelby. At least I could tell this time though.
"I'd rather you didn't actually." I said shaking my head faintly, "Out conversations usually don't end well.." Then again, I wouldn't mind talking to someone. But no, I doubted she'd be pleasant.
|
|
|
|
Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 8, 2009 18:21:07 GMT
"Now that's not very nice at all. I offer a geniune conservation for once you just act like an ass. I'm trying this thing called being normal. Yeah that's it. It's really hard, I don't know how you do it but then again you really don't have that much of a normal life now do you hun?" I ask with a faint giggle passsing my lips but tilt my head slightly to the side waiting for a response on his end. This is always the fun part, waiting for the frustrated answer that makes me grin. Sickening I suppose to some but it's a normal habit it seems.
|
|
|
|
Post by Riley Pearson on Mar 8, 2009 18:24:50 GMT
I sighed and considered apologizing. At least until I heard the rest of what she said, causing me to shake my head. "And that's why." I said looking over to her. I wasn't really frustrated though, not yet at least. "If you want a genuine conversation, then we can have one." I shrugged again.
|
|
|
|
Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 8, 2009 18:43:35 GMT
"So speaking the truth is not a genuine conservation? Since when?" I ask with a straight face and pretending to be confused cause I know most normal people sugar-coat their true feelings and whatever they really want to say to someone secret. For me, that's fine as I could just rummage through their thoughts and find what I'm looking for, but today I'm going to be straight forward and see what's bothering him before I verbally attack him just for a change of pace.
|
|
|
|
Post by Riley Pearson on Mar 8, 2009 18:49:23 GMT
I shook my head faintly, "Nevermind." I said quietly, looking over to her again, deciding to just let it go. Maybe I had missed something anyway. "I'm just sort of.. out of it today." I added with a slightly shrug. She seemed to be being sort of pleasant still, so I guess I could return it.
|
|
|
|
Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 8, 2009 18:52:32 GMT
"Alright then." I say nodding at him with a meek smile towards his direction. "What do you mean by out of it exactly?" I ask before resisting the urge to roll my eyes. "Today? I think that's everyday Riley. You should at least be honest in this conversation for the time being... fucking normal person."
|
|
|
|
Post by Riley Pearson on Mar 8, 2009 18:55:58 GMT
I shrugged a little bit, "I dunno, just a lot of relationship problems." I replied, glancing over to her again. "I'm not thinking too clearly." I paused for a short moment before giving a faint laugh, "Actually that's nearly everyday, so really.." I shrugged. "Not much different, I guess."
|
|
|
|
Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 8, 2009 19:14:39 GMT
"Relationships huh?" Could have told you that as you're sitting here alone... "What do you mean Arden or whoever doesn't love you or someone else doesn't return your affection?" I ask before laughing around the same time he did so it didn't seem I was laughing at him. "It's okay I suppose, I tend to do the same things everyday too." Like torment Shelby's life so she feels absolutely miserable like you are right now. Kudos for you as you can achieve that on your own and you don't need some alter-ego affecting your brain at all times of the day.
|
|
|
|
Post by Riley Pearson on Mar 8, 2009 19:19:27 GMT
I shrugged a little bit, trying to pinpoint the exact answer. "Something like that." I said, keeping it pretty vague for now. Anyway, I didn't really feel like going into great detail. I didn't know whether any of them loved me anymore or not because well, they didn't really tell me.
"Arden's with Logan.. Charlotte broke up with me.. and Riyann hasn't been around." I shrugged. That was pretty much as simple as I could get.. "I don't really even know details."
|
|
|
|
Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 8, 2009 19:24:00 GMT
Right you don't...
I nod a little before looking at him. "Well it's not their fault that you're so pathetic that you can't hold a stable relationship Riley... fuck." I mutter mostly to myself the last part. That was supposed to be inside my head unless I heard my own thought that loud and I'm really hoping that's what truly happened but I have a feeling it's not.
|
|
|
|
Post by Riley Pearson on Mar 8, 2009 19:27:22 GMT
"Gee, thanks." I said slightly sarcastically, glancing over to her for a short moment before looking away. "How do you know it was my fault?" I asked looking over to her. Sure a few things I'm sure were my fault, but not everything. I didn't think I was the reason any of it happened.
|
|
|
|
Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 8, 2009 19:29:49 GMT
I guess it was aloud afterall oh well, so much for being nice for once. "Because I already said, you're pathetic and get all clingy with relationships as if they're supposed to last forever. Nothing is forever Riley hence why you and Shelby are alone constantly." I say in a matter of fact kind of tone before laughing at him. "You must not be man enough for them. What have you done that might have ticked off Arden, Riyann or whoever the hell Charlotte is."
|
|
|
|
Post by Riley Pearson on Mar 8, 2009 19:36:02 GMT
I knew the niceness couldn't've lasted forever. I sighed and shook my head again. "I'm not pathetic.. and maybe I do get a bit clingy." I shrugged slightly. "But some relationships do last forever." I corrected her, folding my arms infront of my chest.
"Just please leave me the fuck alone." I said shaking my head. I would like to say that I don't think I really did anything though.
|
|
|
|
Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 8, 2009 19:40:28 GMT
"Clingy is pathetic Riley. No woman wants a clingy man, it's just annoying." I say waving my hand at him before laughing a bit. "Oh really? Where's the proof of that? I have never seen a relationship that has lasted forever, unless you could prove me wrong with your past relationships... oh wait, you can't!" I say laughing again before glaring at him. "Oh Riley, you're so cute. I'm not going to leave you alone when you're on your lonesome."
|
|
|
|
Post by Riley Pearson on Mar 8, 2009 19:48:07 GMT
"I doubt that's the reason though." I said shaking my head again, listening to her laugh and wishing greatly that she would just leave me alone. I wasn't sure that I had the patience to listen to her today.. or any day for that matter.
I shook my head again at what she said next, rubbing my forehead for a second. I didn't even know how to reply to that.
"I'd rather you would though." I added to the last thing she said.
|
|
|
|
Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 9, 2009 21:38:02 GMT
I sigh as well before looking back at him. "I said I'm not leaving you here baby cousin." I say in a teasing, almost mocking tone that you use with a baby that doesn't understand any formal language. "Well I guess you have your children even if they're stuck with you. I bet they don't even care for you anymore and want to leave just like your previous girlfriends. No one wants you Riley, that's why I have to stay so you don't kill yourself by accident."
|
|
|
|
Post by Riley Pearson on Mar 9, 2009 21:43:21 GMT
I looked slightly sharply over to her, not wanting to hear what she's just said. "You leave my children out of this." I said looking over to her. Actually, she was probably right, they probably didn't want to be with me. I shook my head, and bit my lip for a second, not exactly positive what to add to that. "They don't want to leave me."
|
|
|
|
Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 9, 2009 21:51:23 GMT
"And why would they want to stay with you? You go to girl to girl and all of them choose other men or dump you. And then you divorced their real mother and now she's gone missing isn't she? Why would they seriously want to be with you? I think they would be better off with anyone else but you at this point." I say crossing my legs as I give him a fake smile.
|
|
|
|
Post by Riley Pearson on Mar 9, 2009 22:31:39 GMT
I stared down at the ground, listening to what she was saying despite the fact that I didn't want to. And I didn't want to admit it, but she was probably right, my kids probably don't want to be with me. Look what I've put them through already? They're probably just pretending to like me.. especially considering the amount of time they've been spending with babysitters or my parents. I frowned a bit more as I thought about all of this. I opened my mouth to say something, but I just couldn't think of a reply... at least one that defended me.
".. They love me." I said eventually, sort of quietly.
|
|
|
|
Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 9, 2009 22:54:56 GMT
"I doubt that Riley. I wouldn't if you passed me from babysitter to babysitter and my grandparents just so you can get laid or whatever you do when you're not with them. Probably drink your sorrows away so you don't have to face your responsibilities as a father. Like I said before love, pathetic."
|
|
|
|
Post by Riley Pearson on Mar 9, 2009 23:01:16 GMT
I felt my breathing get slightly more shallow as she continued and I definitely wasn't feeling well. What if they didn't love me? I don't know if I could take that.. I needed them, they needed me, didn't they?
I leaned forward, putting my head in my hands as she spoke, shaking my head faintly, "You don't know what I've been going through, please just leave me alone."
|
|
|
|
Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 9, 2009 23:34:50 GMT
"Do you know what I've gone through? Being stuck in that woman's body. She's as worse as you and you're going to end up just like her. Miserable, alone and pretends that she's happy when she secretly wishes they would all shut up and she could just kill herself. Lovely huh? Shell thinks about it constantly and soon you'll be the same Riley." she laughs at him before placing a hand on his back and rubbing it lightly. "I can end it for you hun if you really want. Put you out of the misery of no one even your children wanting you."
|
|
|
|
Post by Riley Pearson on Mar 9, 2009 23:53:49 GMT
I shook my head again. Not everything what she was saying was true. I was happy sometimes.. and I wasn't thinking about killing myself, that's just.. selfish. That's not to say that I don't need a break right now, because that really is just what I needed, I think. Maybe that's why I kept handing my kids over to my parents and to their babysitter.
"I won't be the same as her." I said shaking my head again. Actually, I didn't even know that it was that bad with Shelby. I knew she wasn't really happy, but wanting to kill herself.. I didn't know that, nor did I really want to.
I shook her hand off my back and scooted a bit more away from her. "You stay the fuck away from me."
|
|
|
|
Post by Shelby Crescent on Mar 10, 2009 1:27:44 GMT
"Awww... that's no way to talk to family, Riley." I say looking at him as I make a tsk tsk noise with my tongue on the roof of my mouth. "Well then, I hope you understand that you're worthless and no one would ever want you... ever. Have fun with that love." I say getting up before leaning down and kissing his cheek. "See you later love."
|
|
|
|
Post by Riley Pearson on Mar 10, 2009 1:38:11 GMT
I frowned, keeping my eyes on the ground as she spoke, feeling more depressed than I probably should be feeling. I didn't want to listen to her, but she made some good points. I wished the things she said didn't make sense, but they did.
I tensed up slightyl as she kissed my cheek and didn't look at her, even though I was thankful that she was leaving. "I'd rather you didn't."
|
|
