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Post by Lilian Parker on Feb 1, 2009 0:18:12 GMT
"Course I still want to." I said with a small nod, biting my lip as I looked back up to him and he started talking again.
I shrugged slightly for an answer this time. "I dunno.. Probably not.. If they ever do.." I said with a faint frown before sitting down on the couch, which was a few feet away from me.
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Post by Jonathon Carlisle on Feb 1, 2009 0:24:20 GMT
I nod, smiling slightly in relief as she says she still wants to, but then frowning a little fairly quickly afterwards.
I pause, staying standing for now and slipping my hands into my jeans pockets.
"Just needs time," I say after a moment, with more conviction that I actually feel, "And we'll be okay."
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Post by Lilian Parker on Feb 1, 2009 0:31:34 GMT
I nodded faintly, pushing some hair behind an ear and looking back up to him. "Okay.. Maybe it'll be normal sooner than I think." I said with a small shrug. ".. If you say so.." I added quietly to what he said with a faint smile.
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Post by Jonathon Carlisle on Feb 1, 2009 0:37:05 GMT
I smile weakly, crossing the room after a moment and sitting hesitantly down next to her.
I don't know what to say to that, really, so I don't say anything.
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Post by Lilian Parker on Feb 1, 2009 0:47:10 GMT
I smiled faintly more as he came and sat by me and after a moment just moved a little closer to him, leaning a head on his shoulder and grabbing onto his hand.
"So.. What've you been doing the past months?" I asked him curiously after nearly a minute of silence, wondering then if I even wanted to know.
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Post by Jonathon Carlisle on Feb 1, 2009 10:39:07 GMT
I shift slightly so I can stretch one arm around her back and take her hand back with the other.
"Not much," I answer vaguely after a moment or two.
Because it's not been much apart from mourning and maintaining fiercely to myself and anyone that happened to ask that I really was alright on my own. That and wandering back and forth between work and here and lying around in the dark in my free time. I don't suppose she needs to know that.
"What about you?"
This is probably a justified question. I don't know where she was, or whether she was comfortable or happy or not. It's as good a question as any.
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Post by Lilian Parker on Feb 1, 2009 15:31:51 GMT
I nodded faintly, glancing up to him for a moment as he answered.. probably the shortest answer I've ever heard for that question. At least lately. I guess it was a fairly normal response.
I shrugged slightly, looking back down to our hands, lacing our fingers together as I did. "Just.. sitting around.. not much to do when you're dead.. Thinking." I ansewred softly with another slight shrug. I guess I did less than I thought.
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Post by Jonathon Carlisle on Feb 2, 2009 8:40:35 GMT
"For all that time?"
Come to think of it, that's pretty much all I did too...think, I mean. But I broke it up with occasional visits and going to work nearly every day.
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Post by Lilian Parker on Feb 2, 2009 12:49:43 GMT
I shrugged faintly with a small nod. ".. Came here a couple times when I could get out.. Didn't do anything but stand infront of your door though." I said with quiet sort of laugh at the end of my sentence, even though it wasn't really funny. "And... yeah.. Didn't do much of anything.." I added as I glanced back up to him.
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Post by Jonathon Carlisle on Feb 3, 2009 9:40:48 GMT
I grimace at that.
I'm not quite sure I like the thought of the fact that she was here and I never knew it.
But I don't know what to say to that, so I just squeeze her hand briefly and remain silent.
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Post by Lilian Parker on Feb 3, 2009 12:54:32 GMT
I catch the look on his face and frown slightly, feeling a bit terrible that I did that. And feeling a bit more terrible that I just told him I did that.
"Sorry." I mumbled quietly, looking back away from him again before he squeezed my hand briefly. So now I just stayed quiet and squeezed his hand slightly back.
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Post by Jonathon Carlisle on Feb 4, 2009 9:02:04 GMT
"It's alright. As long as you're safe now," I mumble, then pause and glance back at her, "You are safe now, aren't you?"
This won't happen again? Or for real?
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Post by Lilian Parker on Feb 4, 2009 11:36:32 GMT
I shrugged faintly as I moved my eyes back to his. "I-I don't know... Probably, yeah." I said with a faint nod. You don't know that.. "But either way, I'm not going on anywhere..." And even if I did, I'd tell him.
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Post by Jonathon Carlisle on Feb 12, 2009 21:56:16 GMT
I bite my lip briefly, because I don't like the sound of that 'probably' or the 'I don't know'.
It's not that I'm not glad to see her, but I don't know if I'm entirely comfortable with knowing she's not necessarily safe either, especially after everything we've both individually gone through just to ensure that she is safe.
"If you need to go, then go, Lil. Your safety's the most important thing."
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Post by Lilian Parker on Feb 12, 2009 22:26:38 GMT
Yes, it was true that coming back sort of just canceled out how long I was gone and what the both of us went through, but I didn't want to leave again. I finally got the courage to come back here.. and to see him.. and now, unless he was coming with me, I wasn't planning on going anywhere.
At hearing what he said I looked up to him, shaking my head slightly. "I don't want to go anywhere." I was pretty sure that this whole thing had blown over anyway. Well, maybe. I couldn't be positive.
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