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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 18, 2009 23:39:30 GMT
So much for thinking that I was actually over Arden.. and I should have known that I wasn't.
I don't know how I did it, but I sort of just forgot. That I liked her I mean. There were so many things going on. Mainly with my sister and with Riyann.. There were too many emotions there and being rejected just didn't want to stay in the front of my mind at the time, so it wasn't. It was in the back of my mind, just waiting for me to do something stupid.
And this time, that little something stupid just happened to be kissing Arden. Again. Except this time, it wasn't me that shouldn't be doing the kissing. It was her. Because of him. Of all the times to kiss her.. and of all the times for her to actually want to kiss me.
Of all the times for her to basically make me kiss her because she purposely didn't pull away even though she knew I wanted to.
This whole thing was frustrating and I still couldn't understand how she could love somebody like him. Somebody who just the other day came up to my door in the middle of the night and threatened to kill me if I ever touched her again.
Actually, that wasn't really saying what type of person he was. If he was actually acting like the type of guy he was, I would either be in Mungos or a coffin right now.
Maybe that was showing something.. maybe he actually was somehow getting better. Whatever that really means.
I was just worried.. about Arden, about my family... about me. Basically just worried in general and now on top of that, I was quite confused and upset to top it off.
Some week I've had. Gah, sorry, it's not so great  |
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Jan 19, 2009 1:26:21 GMT
This has been some week, that's for sure. I first broke up with Jack. He was completely heartbroken. Who could blame him he was going to propose to me or so I think he was. He had a little box in his hands when I told him which has seriously felt as if myself was punching me in the stomach or Rubalyn was punching me in the stomach really.
Then the reason why I even broke up with Jack was for hope that Fitzy was actually in love with me and not just being cold and distant. He said he had feelings for me and I took a chance but it didn't turn out the way I hope it would and he doesn't love me like I wanted. I had a feeling that he still loves Lacey for some reason. I would never understand how he can love her. Lacey left Melody with him with no explanation for two years and just left never to visit or see her daughter.
To top all this off, Logan tortured me about four days ago. My left arm was still bandaged along with my left leg and my ribcage. I really shouldn't have gone to Knockturn Alley that night. Now I'm just wondering about feeling extremely tired and not really wanting to go home again and feeling depressed a lot more lately. I don't know if it's a post symptom of insanity or not but I don't like one bit.
Finally I realize that I'm not at Knockturn, but ironically at the house of the last person who seen me going completely mental in the hospital, Riley. He would know what to do. He always seemed to know lately or maybe it was that I just lost control so much that I'm becoming dependent on people more, like I have with Jenny and Isaiah. Either way, I knock on the door lightly with my right hand as the wind started to play with the bottom of my cloak. |
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 1:38:09 GMT
I let out a small sigh as I sat at the kitchen table in one of the chairs. I had a mug full of tea sitting in front of me on the table, but I wasn't really planning on drinking it. There was something about it just being there that made me feel better. Didn't exactly make much sense, but it made enough sense for me.
Now I was just plain bored.. sitting in this wooden chair and occasionally tilting it back on it's back legs. Something which my mum.. and various teachers.. and bosses.. told me not to do. Kind of ridiculous to do it actually now, but I was still something to do. Even if it is stupid and according to everyone else, I could crack my head open. Which is actually what I tell my kids now.. but they were in their room right now which meant it didn't matter what I did. To an extent.
There was a knock at the door and I jumped slightly as I was leaning. The chair gave an unstable tilt and I gasped slightly and grabbed onto the table quickly.
Okay, so maybe I wouldn't do that anymore.
It took me a moment, but I eventually stood up and walked over to the front door, praying that it wasn't Logan changing his mind about killing me.
So I was greatly relieved when I opened the door and saw that it was Shelby... at least until I remembered our last encounter.. I really hoped she was sane right now cos if she wasn't, I think I might just make her leave.
"Hey Shell.." I said with a faint smile to her.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Jan 19, 2009 1:55:37 GMT
"Hey... Can I come in for a bit?" I ask tugging my hood down before trying to cover up my bandaged some underneath the fabric. "Don't worry, I'm not nutter in the mind anymore otherwise Doctor Arlington would have signed the forms." I add quickly as my mind instantly traces his thoughts of me being crazy. I have no idea what happened when I was there to be honest. No nurse or healer would tell me and that makes me worry a great deal that I actually went that off the handle to the point where they won't tell me.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 2:17:08 GMT
"Yeah," I said with with a small nod, stepping out of the way so that she could come inside. And that was when I noticed the bandages. I stared at them a moment, frowning slightly. "Shelby, what happened to your arm.. and leg?" I asked a moment later, slightly distractedly, waiting for her to come inside.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Jan 19, 2009 2:40:34 GMT
"Nothing." I lie instantly, but I don't try to hide my injuries. After a few seconds I look up at him and shake my head. "You don't need to worry about me." I say again in a more calm voice but I knew he was going to ask again.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 2:43:11 GMT
"You won't worry me. Just tell me what happened." I said shutting the door when she came into the house. There was obviously something wrong and I wanted to know what happened to her.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Jan 19, 2009 2:59:12 GMT
I sit down on the couch and glance over at him before shrugging lightly. "Have you seen Logan lately? Did he mention something about torturing someone?"
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 3:01:33 GMT
I nodded. "Yeah.. I saw Logan.." I said as I followed her over to the couch. "And no, he didn't.. Didn't say much to him. But I can guess that it was you." I said sitting down next to her. "You alright?"
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Jan 19, 2009 3:08:55 GMT
"I'm sorta alright. I have another one around my ribcage. He used Crucio and Sectumsempra on me at Knockturn a few days ago. I still have a few minor little cuts but not as bad as before." I say to him before weakly smiling at him.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 3:19:02 GMT
"Oh my God, Shelby." I said moving slightly closer to her and pulling her into a hug. "That's terrible."
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Jan 19, 2009 3:48:41 GMT
"It's fine, really. You are actually more sympathetic than Arden was about this. I told her it was Logan and she just asks if I was suggesting if she should go tell Azkaban Logan's whereabouts." I say with a sigh as I finally hug him back as I rest my head on his shoulder.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 3:51:43 GMT
"Well.. Arden's going through a lot right now.." I said quietly, as she rested her head on me. "I'm sure that she was diong her best."
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Jan 19, 2009 4:06:04 GMT
"I know and it's like the rest of us aren't. I know that I'm not personally holding a Azkaban escapee in my home but still." I say before letting out a deep sigh. "Like her ditching you for him." I say softly before I realized I shouldn't have said that. I'm sure he doesn't want to think of that at the moment. I turn my head lightly to the side, still resting my head on his shoulder. "I told Fitzy that I loved him." I say after a few minutes before laughing slightly. "Doesn't love me though."
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 4:11:30 GMT
That struck a nerve and I pulled out the hug I was still in wth her. "You don't know what she's been threw.. and that was her choice whether or not she wanted to be with me. Don't judge her." I said frowning over to her.
I frowned slightly at the next thing she said. "I'm sorry to hear to that.." I said giving her a bemused look over to her when she laughed.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Jan 19, 2009 4:18:38 GMT
"I not judging her. I'm just saying." I say to him letting out another deep sigh. I just love how everyone has to look at just one person and ignore everything else that has been going on in the world and with other people. "She hasn't done anything drastic has she?"
"It's fine, just pretty much ruined a would have been marriage proposal in the process from Jack is all." I say with a faint shrug. "I gave up what I had with Jack for something I didn't even have with Fitzy."
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 4:24:31 GMT
I shrugged faintly, frownng a bit more. I didn't say anything in response to that. "I don't think she'd want me to talk about it." I said quietly after a few moments.
I frowned more and shook my head. "I'm sorry.. that's horrible.." I said quietly. "Looks like we should just stay away from that family, shouldn't we?" Iasked, even though I knew I would never be able to.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Jan 19, 2009 4:31:58 GMT
I nod a little at him before deciding against reading his mind to figure it out. "Okay then, if that's what she said. I don't want to break her wishes."
"It's fine. I think we're just meant to be single huh?" I ask with a faint sigh passing my lips. "I don't think I can honestly stay away from him." I add with a faint smile, but it was very meek.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 4:35:12 GMT
"She didn't say it.. I just... If you want to know I'll tell you.. Just don't tell anyone else." I said after a moment looking over to her.
"Yeah.. Rather not be though.." I said with a small sigh. I smiled faintly and nodded. "Yeah.. same.. But not Fitzy.. Arden."
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Jan 19, 2009 4:39:43 GMT
"No, it's fine. It's probably better that I don't know. If I did I have a feeling I'd have to confront her about it and we all don't want that." I say almost in a motherly tone of voice.
"I don't either." I say letting out a sigh of my own before smiling up at him. "Well I would hope so. That would be a little weird Riley."
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 4:42:05 GMT
"She's already been confronted.. she seems okay." I said quietly, playing with the ends of my shirt. "But it sounds like you already know."
I laughed a little and nodded. "Yeah.. no it's definitely Arden." Even though I'm pretty sure that I'm a complete mess because of her now.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Jan 19, 2009 4:50:09 GMT
"I don't know. If I wanted I could just tap into your mind and read your thoughts but I'm not going to."
"That's good then. No stealing Fitzy from me and no stealing Arden from you not that they're even dating us or anything..." I say with a sigh before glancing up at him.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 4:56:20 GMT
"Well, I don't know details anyway." I said with a small sigh, very thankful that I didn't.
I smiled faintly, even though I was really quite depressed and didn't quite feel like it smiling or laughing. "It's a deal.."
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Jan 19, 2009 4:59:47 GMT
I nod to him before standing up and grabbing his hands. "Come on, we shouldn't be depressed about people who don't want us... we should go bake! That always makes you happy." I say pulling on his hands with a real smile now.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 5:04:07 GMT
"But she loves me.. She just, loves him more." I said quietly, frowning again. I looked over to what she said and shrugged. "If you want to?" I asked, not really sure if that would help or not.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Jan 19, 2009 5:07:48 GMT
"At least she loves you. He just said he had feelings for me. And if it was a logical choice he would choose me, but seeing as it's not... no. We're baking." I say shaking my head before smiling a little at him.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 5:16:51 GMT
I shrugged a little bit, still frowning. "I wish it were that instead." I said with a small sigh. She said we were baking and I shrugged faintly, "Okay.. what do you wanna bake?"
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Jan 19, 2009 5:18:15 GMT
"How about some cheesecake." I say with a smile before ignoring what he said. I personally wouldn't want either of the two but I'm not going to say that right now when I'm trying to cheer him up and myself.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 5:22:31 GMT
"Don't you see what I mean? I really love her and she just doesn't love me.. enough." I said letting out a small sigh, continuing even though she didn't comment.
"Sure.. cheesecake sounds good." I said with a small nod.
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Post by Shelby Crescent on Jan 19, 2009 5:32:06 GMT
"Riley, I understand what you mean love. I love Fitzy and he doesn't even love me." I say to him before pulling on his hands again. "It does doesn't it? Well let's get to baking."
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