Delusional [Maddie]

[Scott Hunt]

Scott really missed being twenty-three. That was ten years ago and ten years ago was really not all that great for anyone, including him.
When he was that age, it was better. He wasn't the happiest, but that was because he didn't really know what it was like to really genuinely be happy, and now he did and it'd be taken away, and he'd much rather not know again.
Ignorance is bliss, or so the saying goes.

Also, ten years ago, he was single and ten years ago he had no children. Okay, so now he was single again, and therein lay the problem, but the child problem didn't quite go away so easily.
He wished he could stop thinking of it as a problem. Or her, he meant, of her...not it.
It was hard to really push Louisa out of his mind though, because she sat on the chair opposite him. He could barely see her above the table top, just her eyes, her forehead and her the top of her unbrushed curtains of hair. He was dimly aware of her swinging her legs back and forth under the table, and he couldn't look at her for long because everytime he stole a glance her eyes would be focused downwards and on her lap, firmly away from him and everything around her.

She didn't want to be here, but then again, neither did he.
Scott and Jamie had left here nine and a half years ago, and they'd never really planned on coming back. They'd never made that conscious agreement out loud, but whenever they were done with some other place and sat down to figure out where they were going to go next, one of them would always suggest that they could go home, but they'd always found an alternative.
He supposed that they would have gone on that way forever if they could.
He did try, he really tried hard when Jay had died, they were still going to carry on, whether they were missing one or not. It was his fault, he supposed. He was sure his daughter would accompany him anywhere without kicking up a fuss because she rarely kicked up a fuss about anything, so it was all his decision to come home, and all his fault, and he felt like he was doing Jay a great disservice be being here.
He knew in the rational part of his head that he wasn't, although that didn't seem to be enough.

He didn't intend to stay here, he knew. That was why he'd only rented a room upstairs for the two of them, just for a couple of weeks. He planned to see a few people, and then they would move on. They'd pick up where they left off. This was just a little stop to refocus his head and then it'd all be okay.
He was kidding himself.
He was delusional.
Really delusional if he thought this was ever going to be okay.

After a moment, he spared another glance at Louisa. He watched her struggle for just a second to reach the glass of water on the table that was just out of her reach, then leant forward and slid it forward a couple of inches so it was within her grasp.
She didn't smile, pulled it off the table and into her hands, cradling it like it was a lifeline, "Thank you."
He didn't reply, just lifted his firewhisky to his lips and glanced around the bar briefly. It was pretty empty in here seeing as it was only around midday and the heavy drinking didn't start until later.
He quite liked the quiet, he supposed. He always had.

[Madeline Speare]

I had been here for a while. Staring the the ring of water my bottle of firewhiskey had left on the table. Tracing the ring of water with my forefinger. I was just stalling for time.
Coming back from Azkaban had shaken me, though I suspect it would do that to a lot of people. Everyone had heard the stories about the Wizarding Jail. I shudder slightly, pushing my sleeves further down my arms. Yes, it had been ten years, but the mark was still there. It wasn't as clear as back when he had been in power, but it was still there. It always would be,

Lifting my bottle to my lips, I take a quick swig before running my hands through my hair.
Sirius.
That's why I had gone. It just didn't seem possible, Sirius should not be in that place. Of course Sirius had a temper, all his friends knew that, but he would never go as far as to kill someone, let alone his friends. The very though made my stomach jump.
Lily and James. My eyes burn at the thought and I quickly wipe away my tears before they can fall. I hadn't thought about Lily and James Potter in a few years, I had been to their wedding, they had been friends, and they very thought of them being murdered, by Sirius no less. It was sickening.

My hands are starting to shake again, so I move them into my lap, clasping them there tightly. I could hear Sirius in my head, he had been crying, that's what I think shook me the most. Never before had I seen Sirius cry. Never.
It wasn't right. I hadn't seen him so thin in ages either, his eyes had been hollow, lifeless. I couldn't stay for more then ten minutes or I would have started bawling my eyes out.
I didn't do it Blondie, you know me, I didn't do it.

Putting my head in my hands, I sob softly.
I wish I could believe that.

[Scott Hunt]

"Daddy, look," She barely even whispered it, but of course he heard.
She rarely raised her voice to louder than a whisper at all lately. She'd rarely done it before when she was with him. Of course, she was very different with Jamie. Of course. He wished he could get that daughter back instead, but no, he just had the quiet vacant one instead.
"Look at what?" He leant forward, lowering his voice as well as if they were sharing something secret, private, so he could just cling to some small vestige of closeness.
"That lady is sad," She didn't point, just looked straight in the direction of one of the few other occupants of the pub.

Scott stole a glance over his shoulder and instantly froze, turning back around swiftly.
He didn't much feel like confronting that part of his old life here. He wasn't strong enough today, not yet.
"Finish your drink quick, Lou," He murmured, reaching across the table to nudge her arm lightly, "We're going to go for a walk. How does that sound?"
"I don't want to go for a walk," She mumbled, "It's not the same."
"This is not a matter open for discussion," He muttered, standing up and walking round to her side of the table, picking her up and setting her on her feet.
"I don't want to go," She mumbled again, more urgently this time, then purposefully pushed the table to dislodge the contents of it.
Both the bottle of firewhisky and glass of water promptly smashed on the floor next to them.
Scott closed his eyes in a brief fit of exasperation and for a second considered praying. No, he wasn't that desperate yet.

[Madeline Speare]

The sound of glass smashing breaks me away from my thoughts, and I glance over at the table. This scene is all too familiar for me, and it's reminding me of people that really shouldn't be on my mind at all.
"Fin, come on knock it off."
"I'm not going."
"You don't have a say in this, we're going."
"I don't want to! He doesn't care about us! We should leave him to rot!"

Logan is the last person that should be on my mind, but thinking about Sirius makes me think about Logan and that reminds me that I haven't seen Fin in a couple of days.
Speaking of not seeing someone in a while.
"Scott?"

[Scott Hunt]

"No," He answered without meeting her eyes, on the off chance that he could pass for a stranger.
He knew he didn't look quite the same as he had before, more weather-beaten and thicker set definitely.
"Yes," Louisa spoke up firmly for him, seemingly triumphant with her mission of not leaving.
Scott ground his teeth together, straightening up again but keeping a firm hold of her daughter's hand, "Mhm?"

[Madeline Speare]

"Never thought I'd see you again," I mutter, brushing my hair back behind my ear.
Seems all the Hunt men had a habit of running off, it had been almost nine years since I had last seen him. Last time, I knew for a fact that he didn't have a daugher.
"What's her name?" I ask softly, I didn't have to ask if she was his or not, the eyes were the same.

[Scott Hunt]

"Never intended to come back," He replied stiffly, then glanced down at Louisa.
She bore little resemblance to him really, when it came down to it. She was pretty much Jamie but smaller and with different colour eyes instead. Her skin was more olive, features more pointed, smile more natural. When she did smile at least, but she hadn't done that in a while. It seemed that he was incapable of making her smile when he was on his own.
"Lo-..."
"Louisa," She cut him off with a curious look up at Maddie, "What's your name?"

[Madeline Speare]

Kneeling down so I was at her level, I grin weakly at her. I was never one for talking down to children, I preferred to speak to them at their height, even if it was semi-uncomfortable for me.
"That's a pretty name," I tell her, grinning slightly.
"I'm Maddie," I say, holding my hand out to her.

[Scott Hunt]

Scott sighed through his nose, folding his arms stiffly across his chest to show his impatience.
Louisa probably would not be so kind as to let him get away with escaping as soon as he'd like. She had every right, he supposed. She'd not gotten the chance to talk to anyone besides him in a long time. Maybe he'd let her have this, just once.
"That's a pretty name too," She smiled cautiously, nodding but twisting her hands together and holding them up against her chest protectively.

[Madeline Speare]

Briefly glancing up at Scott, I'm very tempted to comment on how he hasn't changed at all in the past nine years but I know as well as anyone that there's a time and place to talk about how things have changed.
"She's definitely your daughter Scott," I say softly, getting back to my feet, brushing my hands down the front of my jeans."Are you two staying here?"

[Scott Hunt]

Both father and daughter stiffened at that. They were both unwilling to admit any such thing. Ever since Jay had died, they'd stopped being a family. They'd just been two people who'd been thrown together and tolerated each other because they should. It would be a lie to say that they really spoke anymore, or laughed with each other like they should, like they had. Scott didn't read to her anymore, didn't play those stupid little games where she made up and changed the rules frequently, didn't really acknowledge that she was his daughter. She barely even looked at him, she'd learned how to take care of herself.
It was safe to say that neither of them wanted to be reminded of the obligation that kept them together.
"For the moment," He forced himself to answer her question, his tone short and clipped, polite but with the clear message that he really didn't want to be being so.
"We're going back to where I was born," Louisa added helpfully, looking up at Maddie with undisguised interest, "With the kangeroo's. And then to see Aunt Mars where there's lots of sea. And then we don't know where next."

[Madeline Speare]

It's easy to tell that they seem uncomfortable when I mention family. It's still odd to me that Scott even has a daughter, he's never been much of a family man.
I smile weakly at Louisa,"That sounds lovely,"
Glancing back at Scott, I raise an eyebrow,"Ian know your in town?"

[Scott Hunt]

Louisa shrugged up at Maddie in response, remaining silent.
Neither Scott or nor Louisa knew whether it was going to be okay or not, but they both knew that it would never be like it was before.

"No," Scott mumbled reluctantly, shaking his head, "No, he doesn't. And I'd like to keep it that way."
He hadn't seen his cousin in ten years and he didn't think it was the best idea. After everything with Rowan...he didn't think his conscience could handle it, and he was having enough trouble keeping himself together at the moment as it was.

[Madeline Speare]

I bite my lip softly, but nod anyways. Yes, I had a problem with keeping things from Ian, I always had, but there were just some things I didn't..-couldn't tell him.
"Okay, I get it," I mumur, absently tucking my hands into my jean pockets. "So how long has it been Scott, nine years? You been wandering this entire time?"

[Scott Hunt]

His throat tightened slightly, a small frown pulling at his brow.
He'd never had very varied facial expressions, but this was about as close as he would get to showing the topic was a sensitive one.
"Yes, we have," He answered softly, with none of his usual hostility. He couldn't manage hostility about the best years of his life.

Deciding that he really didn't want this conversation anymore, he shrugged in a bored way and changed the subject.
"How are you?" How's my cousin? How's the kids? How's David? How's Nathan? How's Jack and Rose?
He couldn't very well ask all that at once without running the risk of shattering his apathetic mask and actually letting on that he cared. He'd told Louisa frequently that he had no family or friends and no reasons to come back home anyway.

[Madeline Speare]

"We've been pretty good," I mumble softly,"Had another baby two years ago," I say, pulling out Abby's picture and handing it to him,"Name's Abby, she's three,"
Pushing my hair back off my forehead, I grin down at Lousia."And how old are you sweetie? My little boy Alex is turning 11 pretty soon,"