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Post by Riyann Servansikk on Dec 30, 2008 0:03:40 GMT
"Not likely." I said, shaking my head slightly. "Plenty has happened and it's all been on the lesser side of pleasent, far less." I said, shaking my head faintly. "Just don't ever think that this was any of your fault." I said softly, biting my lip faintly.
"Good." I said with a laugh. "And dear god he better not." I smile. "He'll meet the wrath of Riyann then."
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Post by Lilian Parker on Dec 30, 2008 2:24:40 GMT
"And I'm positive that leaving him is much better than killing his sister." I said back to her shaking my head faintly back to her. I didn't know everything that happened between them, but I was pretty sure anything was more pleasant than finding out your wife of ten years just killed your sister.
I sighed faintly and shrugged. "I'm always going to think it was partially my fault, Riyann.."
I laughed a bit and nodded. "Thanks, Riyann."
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Post by Riyann Servansikk on Dec 30, 2008 17:09:25 GMT
"That's not." I started and then let out a loud sigh, okay so maybe none of it was as bad as killing his sister, didn't mean any of it was pleasant, didn't mean that we weren't falling apart to begin with. "There was more than just that Lil." I added softly, shaking my head a little.
"Well don't, because none of it is."
I smiled a little bit more when she laughed a little and laughed faintly now. "You're welcome."
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Post by Lilian Parker on Dec 30, 2008 17:36:15 GMT
I sighed again, "Whatever.." I said eventually, realising I wasn't going to win this one. No, I didn't really know what was going on with them, but I doubt that it couldn't've fixed.
"Fine.." I said again, shaking my head a bit to myself even though I was pretty sure that I was going to somehow still blame myself for it. At least partly.
I smiled a bit back and nodded.
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Post by Riyann Servansikk on Dec 30, 2008 17:43:03 GMT
I sighed again. "Don't be like that Lil." I said with a small shake of m head. "It's not that I want it to be the truth, it just is. Everything had been my fault since the day Shell brought me back." I muttered, shaking my head faintly again. "And Riley, he just dealt with everything. I think he'll be better off without me." As much as that hurts to think you've been thinking that for years, hence the first time you left and all else that happened.
"Good." I said after she said fine. I knew she probably wouldn't listen to me, but I wanted her to know that I strongly believed none of it was her fault. Hopefully she would know that and remember it of all things.
"I missed you Lil."
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Post by Lilian Parker on Dec 30, 2008 17:49:33 GMT
"Then maybe you should try not pushing yourself away from him. That's the only reason it's your fault." I said back to her, shaking my head a bit. I did know a few things that went on, but only what Riley had told me, or what I overheard from others.
I nodded a little bit when she said good and shrugged a bit.
"Missed you too.." I said quietly with a small nod.
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Post by Riyann Servansikk on Dec 30, 2008 17:56:43 GMT
"Don't start with that." I said softly, shaking my head. As if I hadn't thought of that? I had, plenty of times, just whenever I did push myself away I felt it was best. And this time, this time I needed to clear my head, get better before ever coming back. However long that would take. Hopefully it won't be too long, but even if it is, well whatever works and however it works.
Nodding a little I wasn't sure if I should quite believe that because once you're locked up you miss the most random things or people. People you hate even. And really, who'd want to miss me?
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Post by Lilian Parker on Dec 30, 2008 18:02:09 GMT
"Well, I just did." I said shaking my head. "Look, it's your business. I just think you're making a mistake." I said with a small shrug. "I mean.. You just sacrificed your whole life just to save me.. everything you did is just going to make him love you more.. except that maybe you lied your arse off to him.. might think you're a bit thick as well.." I shrugged faintly.
I nodded a little bit. Honestly, I missed everyone and everything. So I hoped that he believed me.
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Post by Riyann Servansikk on Dec 30, 2008 18:07:21 GMT
I stayed silent, knowing that maybe she was right, at least a little bit, but I wasn't going to admit to that, not outloud at least, no instead I was going to insist on leaving because I have to so that if Riley really does still love me, then maybe we'll be able to work things out. You know, after I fix things with my head.
You make it sound like we're broken.
"Yeah and then I'll just mess it all up again. Like I always do." I muttered. Such as holding his wand to him again, or just flat out cheating again, hopefully not either of them, but I know I'll end up doing something. I always do.
"I'm sorry again for keeping you locked up." I add half heartedly.
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Post by Lilian Parker on Dec 30, 2008 18:24:44 GMT
"You don't know that.." I said quietly back to her. "Do you still love him?" I asked a moment or two later. Cause I was planning on asking Riley that later and I wanted an answer out of Riyann first.
I shrugged a bit. "It's okay." I said looking over to her.
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Post by Riyann Servansikk on Dec 30, 2008 18:37:08 GMT
I didn't say anything when she said that I didn't know that. I did though. It was just me, I'd always mess up. Always have and I just, I always will. Runs in the blood you could say. Which really isn't good if it goes down to the twins or Justin. Hopefully it won't, because I'm an idiot and they don't need to be. "Yeah." I whispered, looking away from her briefly. "More than anything." And nothing's ever going to change that. I bit my lip softly, I did love him, and I did love him more than anything, I just can't ever seem to stop hurting him. So I'll be going away.
"Whatever you say Lil."
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Post by Lilian Parker on Dec 30, 2008 18:43:14 GMT
"Then I hope you really do go and talk to him..." I said quietly with a faint shrug.
"But it is.. You just did what you thought was best for me, Riy." I said over to her. "And I mean.. Look at everything you risked?"
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Post by Riyann Servansikk on Dec 30, 2008 18:49:09 GMT
"I will." When I come back. I smiled weakly towards her now, no longer looking away and tried thinking of what to do next. Was I going to leave right away? Probably not. I had to go see Shelby and Jack before I did that. I wanted to go see Riley and the kids, but I couldn't. Not now, maybe later.
"Okay." I said softly, biting my lip a little.
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Post by Lilian Parker on Dec 30, 2008 19:49:47 GMT
"Good..." I said quietly with a small nod and smile.
I nodded a bit again and stayed silent for a moment. "So um.. What are you up to today then?"
[[ sorry.. no clue what to talk about :/ ]]
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Post by Riyann Servansikk on Jan 2, 2009 18:08:14 GMT
I shrugged faintly at her question. "I-I, uhm, I'm not entirely sure, just wandering around I suppose." I said softly towards her, looking at the ground as I did. What an interesting life wouldn't you say? Doing nothing but ruining your marriage, and then nothing but wandering.
"What about you dear Lil?" I asked with a small smile, looking up at her now. It was obvious what she was up to. Wandering around as well and then running to hide from me.
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Post by Lilian Parker on Jan 2, 2009 19:25:50 GMT
I nodded a little bit before giving a small shrug to what she asked me. I smiled a bit, looking back at her. "Trying to get some air and not get caught." I said with a small laugh.
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Post by Riyann Servansikk on Jan 2, 2009 19:35:15 GMT
"Kinda seems like we were in the same boat." I said with a small laugh. Because when you think about it I had been trying to not get caught, though today I hadn't been so careful with it. I guess my wandering could be considered as getting fresh air too. Beats staying locked up in my house in fear of going back to Azkaban, though I hadn't yet done that.
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Post by Lilian Parker on Jan 2, 2009 19:43:15 GMT
I laughed a little and nodded. "Then I think we should go wander and not get caught together." I said with a small smile. "Speaking of getting caught, we need to go tell the ministry I'm alive."
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Post by Riyann Servansikk on Jan 2, 2009 19:49:29 GMT
"Sounds like a plan." I said with a small laugh, shaking my head faintly before returning the smile to Lilian. "Actually, how about you go, I've got a few things to do, and I know they'll take care of you." I said softly.
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Post by Lilian Parker on Jan 2, 2009 19:54:18 GMT
I smiled lightly, "Oh.. yeah.." I nodded a bit a moment later. "Might be better anyway..."
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Post by Riyann Servansikk on Jan 2, 2009 19:57:58 GMT
"Yeah. Sorry though." I said softly, biting my lip faintly as I looked at Lil and then smiled softly. I didn't really have things to do. I just wasn't going there and I had to go.
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