Old Habits;;{{Riyann

[Riley Pearson]

I shut my case, snapping down the snaps already, before she spoke. I don't think I specifically quit becuase of her, but I think it was just that I got busy. I started working more.. and when I wasn't doing that, I was around the girls. Guitar just didn't seem as important maybe. I looked up to her at her question and shrugged. "Yeah.. a bit.. I think I realised we're better as friends though." I nodded a little bit. I just wish she didn't choose Logan.. I added in my mind.
She started to say something else and I raised my eyebrows slightly toward her, already slightly calm from hearing about her stabbing Arden, somehow.
"You what?" I asked a moment later, sort of quietly.

[Riyann Servansikk]

I watched and listened as he shut the case for his guitar, listening to the snaps that he pushed down and just stood there, leaning slightly against the wall now. Doesn't matter, you're still in love with her.
I stayed silent when he said that he realized that the were better as friends. I didn't care.
You do too. Yeah, but it's not like there will ever be another chance for me. He hates me, what good is that for me.
Shutting my eyes for a moment I tried not to show how those few words affected me so.
Why do I have to be so in love with him?
It doesn't makes sense and I really do hate it.
"I nothing." I murmured, staying where I was, eyes shut lightly, propped up against the wall before I opened my eyes and looked over at Riley, before moving my eyes back to the floor. I didn't want to look at him because it still hurt.
Why we couldn't simply be arguing so I could almost hate him was beyond me.

[Riley Pearson]

I sighed slightly and shrugged a little bit when she didn't say much. "You sure?" I asked a moment later, wondering what she was going to say.

I bit my lip a little bit and looked over to her again. "You know if you'd start being nice to me then maybe we could actually get along.."

[[ blah, sorry! i have to go LOVES! ]]

[Riyann Servansikk]

"Yes." I whispered, looking up at him again. That was just Riley for you, having to make sure, even though I was more than sure I wasn't sure, I still wouldn't say anything. Just the stubborn side of me I guess.
I raised an eyebrow at what he next said, not believing he actually said that. "Oh piss off." I said, laughing faintly and pushing away from the wall, starting away from him and towards the stairs. The twins probably hated me, but that said nothing about Justin.

[[Aw.... Tis alright.. Loves too! Hopefully I'll be on more often too!]]

[Riley Pearson]

I nodded faintly, slightly wondering what she was going to say, but trying not to linger on it. It's not like it was probably important. Who knows, maybe she was going to say something else mean and she changed her mind. Maybe she was actually going at an attempt to be nice.

I kept my eyes on her as she laughed softly and started toward the stairwell. "I'm serious, Riyann." I said quietly to her, watching her back as she walked away from me. I didn't understand why I was being like this. She just stabbed Arden. Stabbed her. Do I have some sort of brain tumor or something? Maybe I should get that checked out, because I am definitely not ready to die if that's the case. "Because you may not believe it.. and I may have some kind of... brain tumor, or something, but I still think I love you.." I added, saying the last comment quieter, hearing my voice trail off a bit. I really thought that it was true too. I was pretty sure that I did. Love her, I mean. At least a little bit. All I seemed to do was forget that I did, separate myself from what was going on. But in all honesty, I was also pretty sure that everything she did do to me, and my friends, was making me fall more and more out of love with her everytime. Maybe she should just do something else, so I don't have to keep getting torn apart like this.

I know that I said, probably quite, hurtful things to her. Including the phrase, 'I don't know how I ever loved you', and that I also was the one who, also in another hurtful way, asked for a divorce. But could anyone really blame me for trying to get out while I was still in one piece?

[[ yes! i hope that you are! cause i miss you! ]]

[Riyann Servansikk]

"I didn't doubt that." I said, turning around to face him after a moment after he said he was serious. "It's just that, really, why's it all up to me now? Why do I have to be the only one to be 'nice'?" I asked, shaking my head. Really, I didn't know how he wasn't, but there were points, like with the things he's said to me, with leaving me and then the whole... Arden thing. Really, how did he think that would affect me? I only signed the damn divorce papers because of him, pushed him to sign them because I figured he'd want that. So in my own little way everything I've done, I feel like it was the nicest thing. Until you got to the Arden thing and such, like stabbing her.
"Because you may not believe it.. and I may have some kind of... brain tumor, or something, but I still think I love you.." I shook my head, because he can't mean it, he's definitely got something wrong with him and I don't want to believe that he might love me because then I'll just have to deal with the fact that everything's my fault again, that he doesn't just not love me anymore.
Dropping my eyes to the ground for a moment I tried thinking of something to say. "D-don't say things you can't mean." I whispered, looking at him again before going back towards the stairs and running up them, two at a time, not wanting to hear what he had to say next.
I can't let his words get to me and I'm really trying not to let them go through my head anymore.

[Riley Pearson]

"And what have I done lately then?" I asked crossing my arms infront of me and looking over to her. I looked over to her. I didn't know what I had done except for a couple things that I said, and I really didn't do anything that wasn't provoked. I was upset when I said or did those things and I don't know really.

I sighed and was about to reply but she had already ran all the way up the stairs and I thought about following but decided to just sit down and take my guitar out again. I was going to say that yes, i did mean it, even if I didn't really want to mean it.

[Riyann Servansikk]

"You have no idea." I said, shaking my head a little at him, not going to say anything to answer him and just looked at him for a moment.
Childish.
Sighing a little I stood at the top of the stairs when I'd gotten there.
Riley hadn't said a thing, he might've thought about it, but he hadn't said anything and it was safe for me to run away from that. I could forget all about him saying he thought he was still in love with me, I could forget I'd come close to saying I loved him only a few minutes before, and I could just remember coming to say goodbye one last time and get the hell out of here. I'd come not to say goodbye, but with Riley saying that there was no way I'd come back now.
Not after all this.
Stop acting like such a baby.
The voice was kind of right, but I'd pay no mind to it now.
Letting another long sigh pass my lips I shut my eyes and stood there for a moment before pushing away from the stairs and towards Lil's old room. I dunno how they could stand to stay in there now that they know I 'killed' Lilian and all. The door was shut and there were a few noises coming from behind it so I knew they were in there, it was just a matter of knocking on the door and watching their faces. Oh yeah, that's going to be fun.