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Post by Riley Pearson on Nov 21, 2008 2:53:32 GMT
I shoved my hands in my pockets as I walked through Hogsmeade. Really, I was looking for Christmas presents, but seeing as I'd only bought one thing, it wasn't really working. Nothing was jumping out at me and well, honestly, I just didn't feel like looking for presents right now. I didn't know what to buy anyone.. which really wasn't different from any other year.
But even though I didn't feel like shopping, I didn't bother going back to the house. This was my time off.. pretty much my only free time all week because of work and taking care of the kids.. and today, my parents were watching them. Thank goodness. So that meant, I could actually take my free time and have it only be mine.. which was more than nice.
But instead of continuously walking aimlessly down the highstreet, when I saw an empty bench, I walked over to it and sat down, setting down my one bag next to me.
Everything had been... I wasn't really sure what it had been lately. Maybe just confusing... Everything about Arden was confusing right now. And I wasn't looking forward to telling her about Melody.. but I knew I couldn't exactly just not say anything to her about it. She had a right to know.. I just wish that I didn't have to. I sighed a little bit and bit my lip slightly as I sat there, just staring at a spot on the ground, enjoying just sitting there. Even if it was kind of boring.. and cold.. and well, sort of lonely.
.. Maybe I wasn't enjoying this as much as I thought.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Nov 21, 2008 16:25:32 GMT
I’m starting to wish I had just stayed in Canada… or at least stayed away, even if I went someplace else. Maybe England’s just cursed, that’s all, and there’s no way for things to go right, for anybody, for very long at a time. I really wish Ian and Maddie were back. Instead I’ve just been up to the stupid Shrieking Shack again, looking for some kind of answer. Instead I just felt restless, so now I’m walking aimlessly, broodingly, through Hogsmeade. I don’t know where the hell this borderline depression came from.
I wonder what Ian or Maddie would say if I told them my latest dilemma. So lately I’ve been thinking that I seem to fall for guys that irritate the hell out of me. Maddie, you must understand that one. But anyway, currently that includes a certain childhood friend of mine who may or may not be where he should be at the moment and whose name I am not going to say, even hypothetically, because I can’t dream up the curse words you’ll use.
I wonder if the process of having my memory taken so strangely, all those ages ago, was the thing that turned on this weird switch in my head, the one that won’t let me be certain of anything. As soon as I am, it manufactures doubts, manufactures conflict. I’m probably just imagining everything, everything I’ve ever felt, and really I’m just a blank, empty shell with no emotion. I seem to be imagining that that’s how I feel at the moment. Even when I glance up as I walk past a bench, noticing Riley, my imagination doesn’t conjure up anything else.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Nov 21, 2008 16:39:21 GMT
I saw someone walk infront of me and I looked up to see who it was. I wasn't sure if I was surprised or not when I saw Arden. Though I did know that she was someone to talk to.. not that she really looked like she felt like talking, especially since she didn't really say anything when she saw me.
I sent a small half smile in her direction, lifting my hand up in a small wave. ".. Hey." I said to her after a short moment. Even seeing her now, it didn't really help me much in figuring out what was going on between us. In fact, right now, I was thinking that I probably wasn't ever going to find out what was.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Nov 21, 2008 16:50:27 GMT
"Hey." I smile faintly, preparing already to blame the vague tiredness if he asks what's up. I glance up the street briefly, in the direction I was heading with no real purpose, then shrug and look back at him. "So what are you doing out here?"
It's a whole lot weirder that I'm here, I know. I very rarely venture into the wizarding world. But it's still just a question.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Nov 21, 2008 16:55:31 GMT
I watch her glance up the street and I wonder breifly if maybe she was going somewhere. I was actually about to ask her, when she asked me what I was doing. "Oh, um.. Just some Christmas shopping.. But I think I might be giving up for the day though." I told her with a small smile and shrug.
".. What about you?" I asked back to her a moment later. "I'm not holding you up from anything, am I?" I asked curiously, still looking over to her.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Nov 21, 2008 16:57:52 GMT
"No..." I half sigh, shaking my head. "I'm not doing anything."
Damn... Christmas shopping.
"Is it almost Christmas already?"
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Post by Riley Pearson on Nov 21, 2008 17:06:25 GMT
I nodded a little bit, wondering if she was okay.. She seemed... I wasn't really sure how she was coming off right now. Apathetic, maybe?
"It's getting close enough to it that I thought I'd get some of it done.." I shrugged a little bit. "But, I only found one.." I said witha small nod toward my bag.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Nov 21, 2008 17:08:45 GMT
"Well, that's something," I shrug, smiling faintly again.
If it's possible to choose how you feel, I think I may have managed. I didn't want to feel anything for anyone until I've figured out what's real and what isn't. I certainly seem to have managed the first part.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Nov 21, 2008 17:16:03 GMT
I smiled a little bit and nodded. "Yeah... guess so..." I said back to her, just then remembering what I have to tell her about Melody. I didn't know how I seemed to forget about it as soon as I saw Arden, but I did. Maybe it was just because I didn't really want to tell her. I really doubt that the information is going to make her day any better.
"So um.. You wanna sit down?" I asked with a faint smile to her. There was room on the bench and she was still just sort of standing there.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Nov 22, 2008 3:08:51 GMT
"... Sure," I shrug after a moment of hesitation that there's really no reason for... though it is a little harder to talk to someone when you're sitting side by side, so I make sure to angle myself almost sideways, at the very end of the bench.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Nov 22, 2008 3:47:11 GMT
I noticed her hesitation and just tried to think of something to say that wasn't about Melody.
"So um.. How've you been then?" I asked after a short moment looking over to her and seeing her sitting on the other side of the bench facing me, noting that she was sitting at the very end of the bench.
I really didn't want to just come right out and say it - about melody- but maybe that would be best?
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Post by Arden Patricks on Nov 23, 2008 2:57:05 GMT
Excellent question....
"... All right," I shrug after a moment. "Same old. How about you?"
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Post by Riley Pearson on Nov 23, 2008 3:01:09 GMT
I nodded a little bit, "That's good." I said back to her, now pausing for a moment. "Um.. I've been okay." I replied back to her, biting my lip a little bit. I should just come out and say it.. She said she was alright too, I have a feeling that won't be sticking around for much longer. "... I have to tell you something.." I said a few moments later looking back up to her, slightly worried and nervous about this.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Nov 23, 2008 3:07:13 GMT
I nod in a vague I'm-still-listening way, nearly drifting off into my own thoughts before what he says puts me back on guard. "... Such as?" I ask warily, straightening up a bit.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Nov 23, 2008 3:12:36 GMT
I look over to her, pausing for another moment. "Um.. I ran into Fitzy the other day..." I started off, deciding to stop there for a moment, just to see if she had seen him yet or not.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Nov 23, 2008 3:18:53 GMT
I feel sort of like a puppet with cut strings as I let out a breath I didn't know I'd been holding - instantly relieved even though I wasn't consciously worried. But then I realize that Riley wouldn't likely be so hesitant about giving good news.
"And?" I ask, trying to brace myself again.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Nov 23, 2008 3:21:44 GMT
I bit my lip a little bit for a second, trying to gather how I should tell her something like this. Once I think I have my head straightend out, I look back up to her. "He, um.. He doesn't know where Melody is." I said keeping my eyes on her now, waiting her her reaction.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Nov 23, 2008 3:31:49 GMT
I don't think that it worked. I wasn't expecting that, anyway.
I stare at him in shock for a moment, finally blinking and shaking my head. "What?"
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Post by Riley Pearson on Nov 23, 2008 3:35:06 GMT
"He doesn't have her." I said shaking my head slightly, feeling slightly more worried now too. "Something about Riyann threatening them.. and then he gave her to some random stranger." I told her keeping my eyes on her again, not really positive how she was going to react to that. It sounded even worse now that I said it outloud.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Nov 23, 2008 3:40:35 GMT
Oh my god....
My first reaction now is to stifle a groan, dropping my head into my hands because that is so typically Fitzy it's ridiculous.
"And he doesn't know where she is now?" I repeat, wondering how worried I should be.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Nov 23, 2008 3:42:53 GMT
I shook my head when she repeated what I told her first, trying to measure just how upset or worried she was. She seemed... alright, at the moment. She was taking it better than I took it. "No.. definitely doesn't."
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Post by Arden Patricks on Nov 23, 2008 3:50:42 GMT
"Ah, hell...." I shake my head, sighing slightly. I feel kind of like I should be mad... possibly furious... but somehow it's so... so typical, so unsurprising once you get used to it, that I can't.
"Do you know if he's planning to look for her? Or where he dropped her off?"
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Post by Riley Pearson on Nov 23, 2008 3:53:10 GMT
"You're... surprisingly calm.." I said eyeing her slightly worriedly.
She asked me questions and I blanked for a moment, trying to remember everything that Fitzy had told me. "Erm.. I'm not sure about the looking part.. but I think he said he gave her to someone in Diagon Alley." I told her, hoping that that was what he told me.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Nov 23, 2008 3:56:49 GMT
"Well, it's not like it's terribly out of character for him," I shrug. "I almost should've expected it, you know?" I let out a breath then, shaking my head. "At least it wasn't Knockturn."
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Post by Riley Pearson on Nov 23, 2008 3:59:53 GMT
"Yeah.. but I mean.. Aren't you.. worried?" I asked shaking my head faintly as I looked over to her. I really do think that I'm more worried than she was. Then again.. I tend to worry more than the average person.
I nodded a bit. "Yeah.. That would've been a lot worse.." I said agreeing with her, really hoping that he didn't do something like that and just didn't tell me.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Nov 23, 2008 4:04:12 GMT
"A little," I shrug, biting my lip. "Especially about the possibility that he really might've left her with someone awful. But I've been worried for ages, so I guess it's not that... urgent."
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Post by Riley Pearson on Nov 23, 2008 4:06:47 GMT
You would think that maybe the fact that she was so calm would make me less worried. But that really wasn't the case right now, it was actually almost making me more worried. Almost like, I have to worry enough for the both of us?
I nodded a little bit. ".. So you're alright then?" I asked her a moment later.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Nov 23, 2008 4:13:48 GMT
"Yeah," I nod then pause. "Will be yelling at Fitzy if i ever find him, but other than that I'm all right."
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Post by Riley Pearson on Nov 23, 2008 4:15:20 GMT
"You're taking this a lot better than how I did.." I said with a faint chuckle, giving her a small smile. "And good.. about the yelling.. he thought you were going to kill him I think."
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Post by Arden Patricks on Nov 23, 2008 4:20:05 GMT
"Good...." I laugh slightly. "At least he's aware he fucked up then... or at least I hope he is."
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