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Post by Arden Patricks on Jan 19, 2009 1:50:59 GMT
"Ah," I nod as if I understand. I mean, I do understand what it's like to be frustrated with oneself, but I'm just not sure I get why he is.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 1:53:58 GMT
I think at the moment, I was frustrated with myself for the mere fact that all of this was just going to end with me getting pushed to side. "Yeah.. but it's not a big deal." I said shaking my head faintly. Either way, I like her and maybe it's worth it. Who knows. I wasn't even sure if that made sense.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Jan 19, 2009 1:57:38 GMT
"All right...." I nod slowly, then shake my head. I kind of feel like I should suggest he maybe leave now, at this point... but on the other hand I'm not sure if I'll see him again for a while.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 2:01:28 GMT
I'd been wondering if I should leave for a while... but I was finding myself thinking that I would rather just stay here. But really, I probably should just leave.
"So um.. I can go if you want." I said after a couple moments.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Jan 19, 2009 2:03:07 GMT
"Complicated question," i mutter, not really answering.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 2:05:38 GMT
".. I don't know what that means.." I said a moment later, frowning a little bit.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Jan 19, 2009 2:09:20 GMT
"Never mind." I shake my head again, biting my lip. "Honestly, maybe you should... though that doesn't mean I want you to."
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 2:11:36 GMT
I paused for a moment, looking over to her again. "So you want me to stay.. but you're telling me to leave?" I asked, wanting to get this right.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Jan 19, 2009 2:13:54 GMT
I laugh slightly but silently, shaking my head at the ground. "I guess that is the gist of it, yes."
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 2:19:48 GMT
I smiled faintly, "Do I get to know the reason you want me to stay then?" I asked as I stood up, grabbng my coat.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Jan 19, 2009 2:21:57 GMT
"Do I need one in particular?" I ask, shrugging. "You're a friend."
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 2:24:40 GMT
"No," I said with a faint smile, shaking my head a little bit. "That's reason enough." I added as I started to put my coat on.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Jan 19, 2009 2:28:54 GMT
I smile faintly back at him, willing myself to stay where I am instead of giving a hug goodbye or anything as stupid as that.
"So... I'll see you then, hopefully."
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 2:33:01 GMT
"Hopefully," I repeated with a small smile. That is, if I'm alive. At least that's what I was thinking. ".. I'm guessing you don't want me to hug you?"
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Post by Arden Patricks on Jan 19, 2009 2:36:18 GMT
"Probably not for the best." I smile weakly. "I'd probably kiss you again."
And that most likely wasn't anywhere near the right thing to say.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 2:40:12 GMT
"Oh." I said with a small chuckle. "Sure you don't want to? Probably dead man walking." I asked with a small laugh, shaking my head a little bit. I was joking, so hopefully it wasn't too soon for that.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Jan 19, 2009 2:43:39 GMT
I grimace at that, shaking my head. "Not remotely funny, you know."
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 2:45:17 GMT
"Yeah, guess not." I said with a small, "Sorry." I added with a slight grimace of my own, mainly just at myself. "I won't say that again."
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Post by Arden Patricks on Jan 19, 2009 3:01:17 GMT
"Thank you," I say sincerely... and before I can think better of it move over to kiss him again, lightly.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 3:04:36 GMT
"You're welcome." I said just a short moment before she came closer to me and kissed me lightly. I was slightly surprised, but did kiss her lightly back in return.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Jan 19, 2009 3:12:49 GMT
I know that I'm going to regret this... hate myself for it, even. But I always did have poor impulse control, and screw the consequences until they pile up so high that my next stupid impulse is to top myself and everything falls apart to be rebuilt again. I kiss him a little bit deeper.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 3:16:58 GMT
So I knew I shouldn't be doing this, but hey, if I was going to die, then at least it would be worth it. I kissed her a little deeper back and slightly hesitatingly put my arms around her.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Jan 19, 2009 3:21:59 GMT
I put my hands half in his coat pockets, finding that simpler and less awkward than anything else, and keep kissing him back despite the frequent instructions to stop coming from the back of my head.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 3:25:23 GMT
I wasn't positive, but I think I felt her hands move into my pockets. I thought it was slightly weird, but whatever was comfortable for her was fine for me. I smiled faintly and deepened the kiss again, pulling her faintly closer, hoping that she wouldn't pull away because I felt like everytime I held her a little closer she did.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Jan 19, 2009 3:30:55 GMT
I break the kiss a moment to catch my breath, and as nice it is I think maybe I should come back to my senses now.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 3:32:34 GMT
She broke the kiss and I looked down to the floor for a moment before back up to her, waiting to see what she was going to do.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Jan 19, 2009 3:42:07 GMT
I'm pretty sure coming to my senses would involve moving away though, rather than closer, and certainly would not include laying my head on his shoulder, so maybe I'm putting it off a little longer. Or maybe I'm just in a 'may as well be hanged for a....' however that saying goes sort of mood. The one about how if you're going to be killed for breaking the law, you may as well break it thoroughly. I've already cheated; I'm already a fickle whore. Why not keep it up?
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 3:47:36 GMT
This was... different. She wasn't pulling away and in fact, she had moved closer to me. After moving a bit closer, she rested her head on my shoulder and I smiled faintly and hugged her a little bit closer to me, still being quite surprised that she hasn't kicked me out of her house yet.
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Post by Arden Patricks on Jan 19, 2009 3:56:02 GMT
It occurs to me suddenly that this is a point where I might say 'I love you' if I did. The fact that it's occurred to me but I can't imagine saying it... probably not a good sign.
Sighing faintly, I look up at him again and kiss him lightly one last time, choosing not to say what I'm thinking at the moment. "Maybe... you should kind of be going." Before I bloody manage to lead you on any further.
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Post by Riley Pearson on Jan 19, 2009 4:02:42 GMT
She kissed me again after a moment of looking up to me and I kissed her back, letting her pull away. I glanced down to the floor again at what she said, frowning faintly but giving a small nod anyway. That sounded like she made up her mind. "Alright.." I said quietly, pulling a little bit away from her after a moment.
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