apathy

[Logan Andrews]

"You were talking about masochism when you were doing it," I shrug, as if it doesn't matter and that's the only reason I brought it up.
Maybe I just had a hyper perceptive moment and jumped to the wrong conclusion. It seems possible considering how weird everything else is today.

[Arden Patricks]

"Oh...." I laugh slightly, then shake my head. "Well, I don't do that anymore," I say, making an assumption about what he's probably assuming. I did, however, get attacked by a psych that I invited into the house, and am refusing to get all patched up because I feel like I deserve it. But that's somewhat different and why in the hell do I always do this? Inadvertently hint at exactly the thing I don' want to talk about?
"Have you ever felt as though there are two opposing people in your head, each trying to sabotage the other one's wishes?"

[Logan Andrews]

I frown slightly, but decide not to press that, and also she's distracted me with a question now.
"Strange question," I note, but sort of nod as if to agree.
I think it's safe to say I've had a few issues with voices and the like, if that's what she's talking about.

[Arden Patricks]

"I know it is, but have you?" I ask, shrugging.

[Logan Andrews]

"I guess...why?" I shrug.

[Arden Patricks]

"Just... because I think the little voice in the back of my head just did that, just now," I shrug, shaking my head. And because it made for a lovely, simple way of changing the subject.

[Logan Andrews]

"About...anything specific?" I ask.
I'm not that curious...or even sure that I want to know, but I don't think I want to go back to silence, just yet.

[Arden Patricks]

"No, just the masochism thing," I shrug, then wonder if this counts as sabotage again since I've just mentioned it. Somehow it seems weird to just be talking like this about nothing in particular... but then again we hardly ever do really talk so maybe it's healthy.

[Logan Andrews]

"Ah, the slightly concerning masochism thing," I nod slightly.

[Arden Patricks]

"Which shouldn't be slightly concerning, because really... I don't anymore." I shrug slightly. I've not even been picking at the scab like I used to when I was small. Granted, I only have it because I was feeling a bit suicidal, but he really doesn't need to know that.

[Logan Andrews]

"Alright then," I say, although I'm not quite sure I believe her because she did bring it up in the first place, and then again slightly later...and maybe that's what's slightly worrying.

[Arden Patricks]

I nod again, rubbing my arm because it's always harder to stop a nervous habit when you're thinking about it, and now of course I'm thinking about it. Dammit.

[Logan Andrews]

I raise an eyebrow, but I'm determined not to press it now, so I don't.
Although I still don't know what to say to her. I don't think we actually can be ordinary people.

[Arden Patricks]

"... Hm." I say after a moment, since all that seems incredibly off-topic now but I'm not sure the topic should still be discussed.

[Logan Andrews]

I nod in agreement as if she's said something worth agreeing with, glancing back at the floor.
I just hope the discomfort will fade, because otherwise this is just going to get worse and I'm not sure that it can get all that much worse because it's about the most surreal thing I've ever experienced anyway.

[Arden Patricks]

It occurs to me that I would kind of like to kiss him again, but I think I'm still half-convinced that was temporary insanity and shouldn't be tried again.

[Logan Andrews]

"So I guess we're just going to stand here in awkward silence, huh?" I ask after a moment, twitching a small barely amused smile in her vague direction.

[Arden Patricks]

"Maybe," I shrug. "I'm pretty sure it is one of my favorite hobbies."
I normally don't think I'd smile after saying something like that, but it's still so surprising to him looking amused, almost like a normal person, that I really can't help it.

[Logan Andrews]

It feels quite unnatural to be smiling, so I stop it again fairly quickly. Trying to be an ordinary person is quite difficult.
Then without much regard for what she's said because I don't think she really expects a reply, I ask with a shrug, "Mind if I kiss you again?"
It sort of helped yesterday, and it's easier to be close to her like that because I don't know how else I'm supposed to be. And also I think I'd really quite like to.

[Arden Patricks]

No, of course not.
That's the automatic reply, of course. I'm not sure what the official one should be, so I hesitate a second before shrugging. "No, of course not."

[Logan Andrews]

I'm not sure how to reply to that, because 'good' sounds a bit...off.
I make do with smiling briefly before closing the space between us and kissing her lightly. I feel slightly better about doing it with permission for some reason.

[Arden Patricks]

I kiss him lightly back, kind of liking how this isn't quite as random now, even if it is still weird.

[Logan Andrews]

This is still a little weird, but not as weird and that's enough. So I don't hesitate as much this time before resting my hands gently on her hips.

[Arden Patricks]

I lean up a little bit, kissing him deeper and wrapping my arms around his neck again.

((And so the boringness begins... ))

[Logan Andrews]

I kiss her deeper back.

(i'll say...don't know what else should happen...hard to figure out...brain exploding...)

[Arden Patricks]

((Lol... hm. We could just end this thread and start a new one later? Or I was thinking of rping as Fitzy for a bit, with Logan. That could be potentially entertaining. *shrug* 'Cause yeah, I'm drawing a blank here.))

[Logan Andrews]

(yes, good idea! and that does sound entertaining...we should do that. )

[Arden Patricks]

((Coolness... I'll try to start a thread.))

[Logan Andrews]

(yay ;D )

[Arden Patricks]

((Right, well... key word being try. Although I possibly didn't do that yet either.))